Saturday, December 31, 2005

That was the year that was

Well as we inch towards 2006 I am looking back at this year and out of 10 it gets a 6. Not bad considering some of the awfulness it contained but in summary here is the good, the bad and the ugly:


I found out who some of my most wonderful friends were when they stuck by me through every event and torrid emotion this year.

I had the most wonderful birthday helped especially by some of said friends who did lots of things to make it so special.

My parents as usual this year have been a huge support and comfort even at my ranting times.

I finally started fulfilling one of my life ambitions to start a degree.

I had my hair professionally coloured for the first time.

I had a few significant monetary windfulls.

I finished some beautiful cross stitch pieces especially Taj Mahal by Chatelaine.


This was the first whole year without Sara around to share stuff with.

I had to walk away from something I cared so deeply about.

It started to look like a big mistake had been made about my health which had a big detrimental effect on me emotionally.

My health has been less than good with alot of minor stuff going on.

I broke my foot which STILL isn't healed nearly 7 months on.


The stupid seller on ebay who sold me a digital camera and then nicked off with all the money.

A few nasty fights and name calling on msn which I didn't want to partake in.

A severe betrayal occurred by people I thought would be life long friends.

I think that is mainly it actually and it seems that the good does indeed mainly come out on top.
So here's to 2006 and may it bring you all health, wealth and happiness (which reminds me to add another couple of good points lol).


Thursday, December 22, 2005

I am back

Wow what a busy week. Its mostly been spent getting Christmas sorted and finishing off my study so I can have a good break. Tuesday everything went pear-shaped as I came down with a nasty bug but its passed quickly so normal service is resumed and I am now catching up on that I missed.
I now think its unlikely I will finish my Newton's Law Christmas kit in time and as for the Just Nan I bought well that can wait for next year, but its a Limited Edition so the important thing is I have it. I also think with stitching on Newton and getting into my knitted scarf I probably am more likely to finish MVIII next year too but as all the stitching is done this year thats enough for me.
I spent today with my friend Jane and her husband just eating and drinking and shopping and it was really great. A relaxing day which I have needed for so long.
I have also been trying to catch up on people this week who I have been missing as I haven't gone into msn for so long. My head is in a better place than it was as this last week I also had rather a big reaction to everything that happened this year and felt really down, but its slowly getting better esp now I am making plans of how to tackle it.
Other than that if I don't make it back here until after Christmas have a good one everyone. And BIG apologies to the poor blog display. I did have alot of stuff uploaded to Photo bucket but when coming to arrange them here they either didn't look right or I just didn't have time to sort them out properly, but thats what being a student does for you heeheee.

Thursday, December 15, 2005


Now I only have the beading to do:

I am absolutely over the moon to have finished all the cross stitching before the mystery finishes. I 'hope' to completely finish before the end of the year, but there are alot of beads to sew on so its not definite.
In other news I haven't got alot to report but I do seem to be excessively busy at the moment. Of course its the usual Christmas preparations combined with OU work. My final assignment of the year has now gone in so I can start to wind down a bit now.
We put our tree up today and its looking great this year and also in the decorations box we found my melting snowman candle. Its a cool candle I got from a charity catalogue last year. I got a large and a small one at a discount for buying both, and gave the small as a present. I will try and get a picture, but essentially it is a snowmans head on a melted body and lasts for ages. We put it on the grate today and the cat is being ever so neurotic around it lol.
On Tuesday we went to a local garden centre and I got a little fake tree for my room and some room scenters and candles with Christmas smells, like brown sugar, christmas pudding etc. One lovely oil I got for my burner from Colonial candles was simpley called Noel and well its beautiful-sums up the festive season perfectly.
On a slightly down note I am still keeping quiet as I still feel very stressed and wound up which is always the case at this time of year and doesn't help as I start to look back on the year and whats happened.

Sunday, December 11, 2005

New stash

In all my excitement of the lottery win yesterday I forgot to blog that I had got stash. As it was my birthday month in November I got a nice discount from Needlecraft corner. I decided to use it on the Jeanette Douglas chart and accessory pack for Northern lights and some Rainbow Gallery treasure braids. I also had the Limited edition Just Nan on order though there was no further discount on that as it was a special package. Its a really pretty kit and even includes the Whimzi frame and wadding to make it so I am really pleased. Just at the end of the month as my order was being processed I saw that two new charts were out by Calico crossroads. They are doing seasonal ones using overdyed threads and I got December and January and one thread to go with it. As they were not due out until December I knew I wouldn't get the discount but Drema who owns the shop very kindly included it anyway.
Its been a busy couple of days with Christmas preparations and studying. I have an assignment due in on Friday and I am nearly there now. Then its a bit more reading and over Christmas we can look forward to a well deserved break. I am really enjoying this course and starting to cast around for the next one. However its too early to decide yet so will just keep a note of what areas I am enjoying at the moment.
Finally in the UK we woke to hear that there has been a huge explosion at an oil depot in Hemel Hempstead in Hertfordshire which is not far from London. Luckily hardly anyone was seriously injured in this and now we wait to find out the cause. It is logged as an accident at the moment and I hope thats true. Whatever the cause its going to result in chaos for a bit with both transport and possible petrol problems.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Lottery news

OMG I cannot believe it. I got 4 numbers tonight on the Thunderball which is £100. If my foot wasn't still broken I would be dancing wildly round the room. What a great and wonderful boost and a lovely early Christmas present.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Quick update

Life has got so busy in the last week its untrue. I guess its that time of year with trying to get Christmas shopping done on top of OU work I want to get ahead of so I can relax at Christmas. I also want to sit down and finish MVIII but am making solid progress in the evenings so far so we may get a finish this year.
This past week has not been a good one as the fracture clinic told me that 6 months on my foot still isn't healed so there are a couple of possibilities. As I am not in any discomfort-well wasn't until they prodded it they will leave it and see me in another 3 months. There is the chance as it is a slow healing break it could take 6 months to a year-not sure if thats from now or the orginal break but get the impression its the former. The second option is surgery to have a bone graft put in but as I don't work and its not causing too many problems this will be more of a last resort. However the Dr examining me was quizzing me on my medication and as my Calcium is quite low he wanted that up to try and help. As luck would have it my Kidney consultant was at the dialysis unit yesterday so I rang and asked them to pass on a message. Today he has changed some drugs and is liasing with the Orthopaedic consulatant to see what the situation is. This is also because the Dr I saw who I think was a registrar said it looked like I may have osteoporosis in my feet. But I had a bone density scan 10 months ago and that was completely normal so think this maybe a throw away comment as the consultant I saw before didn't say anything and my bones can't be thinning that fast. I do wish Dr's wouldn't make throw away comments as he couldn't point out where on the X-ray it was, sort of just waved his hands around alot.
Tomorrow it is a study day and Christmas shopping in the afternoon. I hope I can manage my shopping a bit better on this new Calcium regime as I have been very achy lately and this could be the answer.

Friday, December 02, 2005

MVIII Part 11 finished plus other news

Just in the nick of time on the day the new part was released I completed Part 11 of MVIII:

I have had such a busy month with OU work, birthday celebrations and various appointments I am pleased to have caught up.
Talking of OU work I got my latest exam back today and it was in my OU inbox late last night but for once I hadn't checked lol. Well it was much better than expected and I got 68% this time. I am really pleased with that mark as I wasn't sure that I had tackled it completely right. In actual fact what I missed out I wouldn't have ever considered putting in anyway so thats also a lesson learned for the future.
On Tuesday I went to see my consultant to talk over the transplant issues and a more positive spin was put on it this time. One slightly annoying issue is the surgeon who refused me 3 years ago on what has now been proven to be false information may now agree to perform the operation. So I haven't made any definite decisions as depending on who I talk to and when I keep changing my mind. I have no timescale in which to decide so theres no urgency but equally I can't procrastinate forever.
Onto other stitching I am more and more in love with Chatelaines Japanese Garden. So far I haven't signed up but might think seriously of doing so in the next few weeks, esp as I still have to sign up for MIX anyway.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Knitting and a new cat toy

This afternoon I had a crack at the knitting kit I got for my birthday and all was going great. I had done around 14 or more rows when a stitch dropped. So me being me I panicked so it went further down. In the end I decided to just work my way back but more kept dropping and/or falling off my needle. So mum had rescued me a few times before then and had a go at another rescue attempt. Unfortunately it was terminal so I am going to start again.
As for the new cat toy well it is the case on row that I couldn't unravel. For a 15 year old he is quite nimble on the old pins.
But having said all that I really enjoyed the knitting and will go a bit more careful next time. I think the problems kicked in when my confidence grew. Oh and the wool is just so pretty.:-)

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Stash enhancement

It all started when I saw that the new Limited edition Mirabilia had 25% off at Stitching bits and bobs. I then decided I really would like Victoria Samplers Jingle bell farm so got that with the two accessory packs too.
This is on top of my birthday discount I spent at Needlecraft Corner the other day. That time I got Jeanette Douglas' Northern Lights chart and accesory pack as well as some Rainbow Gallery PTB. The weird thing is I would have spent more for my birthdy but all that I had my eye on was exempt. So made up for it at stitching bits.
Actually there seems to be a theme here-winter and or band samplers. But we all ahve to treat ourselves once in a while eh?
I think it was a cheer me up day as I was supposed to go out tonight but felt too mentally and physically drained and had panic attacks I wouldn't manage it. I almost think its more depressing to try and fail than to not try at all where my health at the moment is concerned. But I also know it is because I am down and don't want to do much or have anything else upset me at the moment. Oh for the days when things were simple-way back when.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Dratted kids

Last night my sleep was disturbed by kids ringing our doorbell at 12:15 AM. I think they saw a light on in the bathroom and as we live in a bungalow when challenged they ran off.
Naturally when the doorbell goes anytime after about 9:00pm you wonder if something awful has happened and at that time its even worse. We have quite a few relatives that live away from the area so they all go through your mind and you pray they are all safe.
The weather has bit hard in some parts of the country today and even places less than an hour away have had snow. We had one flurry at about 7:00am and that was it. Otherwise it was the perfect winter day-sunny and crisp. Where I was last weekend is extremely bad and the roads we drove through have stranded cars on them and the town itself is pretty much impassable. Its amazing really as Cornwall gets less snow than us but its hit them bad this time. As luck would have it Jane is away in Cuba at the moment so has missed it all and hasn't had to battle through it.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Another one down

Today I sent in assignment number 3. I can't believe how quick the course is going and in 3 weeks time the last one of the year is due then we get a couple of weeks off for Christmas.
I am cautiously optimistic that I did ok as I got everything across I wanted to and came in on or under the number of words stated-fingers crossed I really did feel well after dialysis and wasn't reading it through in a total haze. However most of it was written it was just the tweaking I did today so it should be ok.
So tomorrow I am now free so off to visit friends who recently had a baby and then have a relaxing few days until next weeks 'fun'. This is written like this as it is not fun as have to struggle through the contra flow from hell on the M5 during rush hour to see my consultant to discuss the transplant issue with him. Unfortunately the mood I am in he could get an earful and that would be unfair as he came into all this part way through. He has only done his best for me but in all honesty it is an utter mess. My poor head hates having time to think as it just spins out with this subject alone.
But before that I might have a night out in Bristol to look forward to on Saturday and a little bit of stitching inbetween. Those trees are not going to defeat me I swear it lol.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Busy, busy

Well today just flew past. I haven't been feeling 100% for a couple of days now and woke up this morning hardly able to lift my head off the pillow and hurting all over.
Depite that I had an essay I needed to do. Well two actually-one of 300 words and another of 900. I had planned them on Thursday and even partially written the 300 word one so I cracked on. The 300 word one went like a dream-usually it takes ages to get it down to 300 but I am happy with it. The 900 word one? Well 9 hours later its at 903 words and I am relatively happy with it. Why the panic? Its due in on Friday and I can't guarantee how much I can get done tomorrow and Friday after dialysis and I am supposed to be out all day Thursday. As I am not quite right and I have over done things in the last couple of weeks I may not go out now and get my essay done and sent instead.
So since finishing Autumn Garden sampler I have done no stitching apart from a tiny bit yesterday on my MVIII trees. I am in a severe slump with those trees and this will probably be the first month I don't keep up with it. Its a shame really as next month is the last part and then I have the beading to do. So with the delays I definitely think it will be next year before its finished now. It was only a vague hope it would be this year but those trees are proving a bit of a bind lol.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

A weekend away, results and a finish

I came back from a weekend away in Cornwall this afternoon and it was a really nice relaxing break. Even though I wanted to help my friend Jane and her husband were the perfect hosts and treated me like a Queen. We went shopping in Exeter yesterday and with its Tudor buildings and Gothic Cathedral it was really atmospheric. I even managed to get a couple of little Christmas presents.
When I got home my results from my first assignment were in. It appears they arrived late Friday evening and I got 72% which is a scrape in at the second pass mark so I was very pleased indeed with that. My next one has to be in on Friday and I am pushed for time on this one so am just hoping for a pass lol.
The finish is the Autumn Garden sampler from Victoria designs:

Its now gone in to the Silkweaver competition-so far 3 are have been submitted, so fingers crossed for that.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

A pink and glittery birthday!!

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Today I turned the big 30 and it has been fun, fun, fun. Why pink and glittery? That describes my cake:

I knew I was getting one so just asked it to be pink and glittery and this is what mum chose. It is just fantastic!! I came up with the glittery idea after having glitter on a previous cake and as I love pink it was the obvious choice.
To mark the occasion I also got a big balloon which was almost as tall as me:

Even my dialysis unit made me a badge/necklace, fake cake, put ribbon, tinsel and 'glove' balloons over my bed with posters on the machine. They even put a sign on the main front door. For those who know where my photobucket album is all pictures are in there. I am uploading to Webshots but it is playing me up again so that will take awhile.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Well what can I say!!!!

Yesterdays birthday celebration was absolutely fantastic!!

For many months we have been contributing stitched sheep for a quilt for Gina but unbeknown to me one was going round for me too. Mine was based on mainly Teresa Wentzler designs but the most special part was that the lady herself designed and stitched a piece for it. It was one of her designs that she then adapted but its still completely unique and she signed it which blew me away. Here is a picture of the quilt:

It is so gorgeous and I can't even begin to describe how touched I am and what I feel for all the people who got involved. I don't think words are ever enough here but I can't stop looking at it and just love it so much.
Its on my bed at the moment and I am constantly admiring it and stroking it-oh and the ginger one is banned from going anywhere near it.
This week is going to be very busy as fingers crossed I have my flu jab tomorrow afternoon. Tuesday I am also fingers crossed having my haor cut and coloured-this was cancelled due to staff illness on Thursday. Wednesday is my birthday and I am taking cakes into dialysis which is a kind of tradition if you are dialysing on your birthday and if I feel ok we will go out for a really nice family meal that evening. Then Thursday is going to be a study day and Friday I am off to Cornwall for the weekend to see my friend Jane. Any other spare time where I am not sleeping will be study time as I have half a unit to finish and a couple of assignments to get in by the 25th-and not alot of time lol. Which also reminds me that sometime this week I will get my first marked assignment back too-eeeekkkk.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Amusing quiz.

I saw this in Kates blog and had to have a go. You put you name and the word wants into Google and see some of the funny things that come up. So Michelle wants:

To visit 27 places - could apply to me.

Break down barriers in golf - don't think I want to do anything with golf.

Danny to stay with her - I don't know any Danny's.

Her lover to afford her more freedom - hey I got plenty of freedom because I don't have one.

To know more about metallic elements - not today I don't.

To go topless in her next film role - only if its straight to video.

To become a multi culti cusine Queen - hmmm possibly need to be able to cook English food well first.

Tony's input - think I would need to meet him first.

To help her friend Jason create a swanky bachelor pad - well my cousin is called Jason and lives on a narrow boat lol.

To start an advice to the lovelorn column - as if I'd be able to help them.

To pick bigots out of society like weeds in a garden - don't we all.

The squeaky toy the trainer has behind me - Woof.


Taj is home

I have had a really busy day so only just able to take pictures so they aren't quite as good as they could be. But here you go:

So this is the whole picture:

This is a close up of the top right corner so you can see the frame details:

I am really pleased with how its come out and so glad I went with this frame as its a bit of a lottery when it comes to choice. However it seems to set all the colours off very well.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Forgot to say

When I blogged yesterday I forgot one piece of good news. When I got back from laying the flowers I had a letter in the post. Remember I got half my course fees back from the OU? Well I was wrong as that was a grant for books, travel and any other supplementary items. This letter contained a full refund for my course. So all the hassle and problems of applying were worth it and I hadn't taken in you could get above and beyond your course fees.
I was as over the moon as I could be at that point in time as this is a very generous grant, so I could afford to treat myself a small bit now if I wanted.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Emotional few days

I keep trying to post here but Blogger keeps eating them.

Ok well Saturday was the anniversary of Sara passing away so I went and laid flowers on her cremation plot and then went to a local outlet village with mum and dad. It was a singularly bad day as not only was I not in the mood for shopping it was hissing with rain and all the food at the village was horrible. I also didn't feel at all well so we came home and I tried to chill out for the rest of the day.
Yesterday was spent finishing off my latest rotation piece and then studying as Block 2 has just started and I also had some kind of massive reaction, so again didn't feel well.
Today was my visit to the transplant surgeon and I now have alot to think about. My risks of not surviving have decreased by miles but are not out of site-gone from 50% to under 10%. But there is only a 50% chance of getting a fully successful outcome in terms of getting a good working kidney and I may undergo surgery and it may not even be possible to proceed.
Its now over to me to decide what I want to do and if I even want to proceed. There is also the small chance that the hospital won't be allowed to do this as the other surgeons are not too keen and may veto it altogether.

So thats the start of the week and this week I still have my assignment mark to come in-eek, Taj back from the framers, hair cut and coloured and I think thats it. No wait isn't there the small matter of a birthday do this weekend? Yippeee.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

What a great day

Its been a really nice day today. As we are in reading week for my course I am able to relax and chill a bit. Today I went and had my eyebrows waxed and shaped professionally. I was booked in for a local place for today but they cancelled due to staff illness on Wednesday. Luckily I got a last minute booking at a place near town after seeing an advert in the paper. I really enjoyed it and felt throughly pampered. I have always done my own up to now and growing them out has been awful-I have really had to resist getting my tweezers to them lol. But after having them done properly I can appraise two things. One my previous efforts were not bad but two this looks much better so at £5 per month I am going to go regularly.
Then this afternoon I went for a wander into town and got some stuff from The Body Shop. I am in their card club so you also get £5 worth of products free in your birthday month. I chose a Papaya lip balm for £4.50, but they still take £5 off the total. It wasn't a good choice though as what should be sat on my dressing table when I got home-yep the one and only twin of it. :-S I could have sworn I had never bought one like that either lol. I also bought some make up and being a sucker for a freebie I bought some stuff I was dithering over to get a free set. This contained a neutral lipstick, a small bottle of White musk perfume which I love, a miniture cocoa butter body wash and a small tub of Vitamin E moisture cream all in a pretty cosmetic bag.
Then it was off to Boots to buy my shampoo and bath stuff-again a disaster as I got home and had a spare bottle of shampoo sat in the drawer-must remember to make a list next time lol.
I tried to stitch tonight but couldn't get into it so made a Mandala for a card and now here I am surfing before bed.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Good stuff/bad stuff

To start off with the good. Friends of mine have emailed me to tell me that their first child has arrived safely in the world on Sunday afternoon. So cue a new start-Just Nans birth sampler. Call me a cranky old crone but didn't want to start in case I jinxed anything lol.
Still on the good side I took Taj in to be framed this afternoon and I am hoping that it turns out as nice as I am imagining it will. I pick it up next week so will post a picture for you all once its home. I hate leaving my precious stitching with others lol so I hope my babys ok.
More good stuff-will it never end lol is that my assignment went in yesterday, so have some spare time to myself to stitch, read and chill.
Bad stuff is that at the moment I am not coping very well. It is a combination of things but I feel under an extreme amount of stress and I know it won't leave for a good week yet, as the anniversary of my friends death is this weekend and my appointment for the surgeon is also looming. Its kind of stirred up alot of stuff I wasn't expecting really so at the moment I am spinning out.

But the good outweighs the bad so thats something and we have now entered my birthday month woooohoooo and at the moment I am finalising my plans and lurching from looking forward to it to dreading it lol.
Thanks for allowing me a whinge. Going back to stitching now as all the new parts of the Chatelaines are out. :-)

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Medieval Town Mandala Part 1 Finished

I am so pleased with how this one came out. The colours are slightly off as I am stitching it on Silkweavers Parkland Laguna which is a really light green, but you get the general idea:

My first assignment for my OU course is done and dusted and just needs to be emailed. That means I have a week off from major study, so I feel some stitching sessions coming on. :-)

Friday, October 28, 2005

OU stuff

I am coming to the end of Block 1 which also means my first marked assignment is due in a week today. I am not really sure how I am going to fair but I think it will be ok.
I also got confirmation today that I have received a grant towards my studies so thats really great news. Filling out the forms etc was a major headache but more than worthwhile.
There isn't really alot of other news except that I am likely to HD Part 1 of MTM within the next few days. All ready for the next part.:-)

Monday, October 24, 2005

A small finish

I finished this small Bent Creek design called The little black kitty this afternoon:

It is stitched on Silkweavers Parkland linen and I have now entered it into their competition. This is the first year I have been together enough to enter and now have two things in-both of them small. I even kept one in its original bag waiting for the competition to start that was finished almost a year ago, so now its fingers crossed.
Today I have gone down with a cold and even have a temperature of 38 ish. This is typical as I am due to have my flu jab tomorrow. We tried to cancel but when they said all sessions are full and they can't give any idea when the next lot will be we are hanging on and hoping for a miracle cure lol.
I don't think its helping as I am so tired, run down and stressed out lately. The OU course is going well and that is a good source of stress and I am so glad I got in now as I would be a complete wreck without it.
I have just read some of what I wrote and have edited it as this was a really depressing post lol and I just need some space to get my head around things. Not sure making it public is the best move either.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Proof of the pudding

I have my British blinkie so thought I would do this quiz to find out how British I really am:

Jolly good, wot! Anyone for tennis? That'll be ten ponies, guv. You're the epitome of everything that is english. Yey :) Hoist that Union Jack!

How British are you?

this quiz was made by alanna

As I thought really but it was good fun.

My fireside cat

This is my devoted cat Taffy last night fast asleep at my feet in front of the fire:

He had looked even cuter a few minutes earlier but he is not as obliging as Scully bun and moved, but its still a lovely picture.

Saturday, October 22, 2005


I have just been on a major shopping trip which is also the biggest since my foot has started to improve. I went to the centre of Bristol and met one of my best friends who is in the area for the weekend and we shopped, ate chocolate, drank tea and gossiped. It was a realy lovely day and I got a lovely denim jacket in a 20% off sale in Debenhams. It has a furry collar, cuffs and bottom edge and is absolutely gorgous. It was from pineapple and was only £35 before the discount so was a real bargain. I also got a pair of purple sterling silver dragonfly earrings in Debenhams, but it took me ages to decide on the colour as they had so many options. If the pink had had solid wings that probably would have won lol. I think they will be a slight drop as the tail of the Dragonfly had little silver balls to make it and add flexibility.
So I have eaten too much junk, drunk too much tea but had a really great relaxing day and its just what the doctor ordered lol.
What did suprise me was the amount of Christmas stuff in the shops and the House of Fraser has its trees up. I am not a mean-spirited old crone but this does seem a tad too early.
I also got my appointment for the surgeon arrive 2 days ago and the only thing to be thankful for is it will be done and dusted by my birthday, but otherwise the timing is not ideal-oh well beggars can't be choosers. This did send me into a bit of a panic as I can't face it being like last time-which is unlikely and its now become all too real. But its not for awhile yet so will put it out of mind for a bit.
Tomorrow I have to spend the day writing an assignment-its 300 words so not many but is on music and a particular piece. If the last 2 are anything to go by it will be a good 7 hours from start to finish, but I have done some preparation so I am hoping it won't be that long.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

A new start a day....

....Makes for many WIPS. :-)

I started a tiny one yesterday which was Bent Creeks black Kitty. Can't remember its proper name but it is tiny and sort of wild and Halloween looking. But today I started Medieval Town Mandala. Yipppeeeeeee!!!!
Today has gone slow but has been really great. I stitched a bit on Royal Holiday this morning and then did an hours study before lunch. After lunch I hit the books again and did another couple of hours, surfed a bit then started MTM.
However MTM didn't start off that well as the first colours and symbols are so similar that after 9 stitches I had to start over. But I am now on track and loving it.
Tomorrow it is the usual dialysis and probably stitching on the Cat tomorrow afternoon and surfing a bit.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

MVIII Part 10 finished

Great timing for this months part as I have a whole half a month to work on other stuff and start Medieval Town Mandala.:-)



Haloscan has now been added to my blog so I can control who comments on it a bit better.
I was absolutely stuck with where to put the new bits in my template so went for automatic wizard. Well despite it saying it was publishing the new template for me it kept disappearing so I simply copied and pasted in the end which seems to have worked lol.
The hours I put in to this blog and most of it is simple if you know what you are doing is quite immense. However I enjoy it and am learning all the time.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Financial boost

My finances got a much needed boost with a £50 premium bond win. So now its decision time on what I am going to get. Obviously one of the Chatelaine Mandala gardens sprang to mind and of the new ones out it would be the Japanese one. I would like to see another WIP first to be sure before I commit to that one as its always niggled me whether I like it 'enough'. I have bought some of the threads for MIX and mum and dad are making up the rest between my birthday and Christmas so for the moment the cheque will go in the bank and I will make up my mind at a later date.
Today was mainly spent studying, tidying my room and some more paperwork. I am still soting out getting a grant for studying, as the initial form was sent back because they need more details. So after filling in forms and phone calls I have got as far as I can today and hope people follow through on their commitments of sending me infomation.
Tonight I am going to stitch MVIII as I have just have one more corner to do for this part. I am anticipating a HD over the weekend if not sooner.
Once that is done I will probably stitch something small for this months HD and then may even start Medieval Town Mandala.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Re:Not much going on

This is the longest time I have ever not blogged, but there is really not alot going on.
I was at the doctors on Monday evening for a bad virus which at times has felt a bit like flu. I was getting such severe pains in my head that I wanted to double check that I had no infection as I was on the pain killers every 4 hours. This is very unlike me and although it was like a neuralgia pain it was the severest I have had for ages, so felt worthy of being checked. Anyway there was no infection and I was told it should ease this week and today thankfully its much better. When it was hurting to that degree stitching and studying became hard to concentrate on. Whilst I was at the doctors I got my flu jab booked. They seem to be having real problems in our surgery again as I usually get the jab at the end of September and its now going to be the end of this month. Originally they said we couldn't book until Oct 4th and then it got put back to Oct 11th.
I overheard a conversation the other day that I really hope is not true. Apparently the new machines for the unit are not likely to come until next year which I can live with. But what was disturbing was that someone has forgot to order ones that do the kind of dialysis that helps people who have been on it a long time. Great!!!! It wasn't the sole reason for getting them I know, but this is the only time now we can have machines that do this as the NHS won't buy any more for many years. Its not just me that needs this function as there are many others who need this feature and I am sure more in the future.
Stitching wise I should be finished with MVIII Part 10 by the end of the weekend at the latest and I am really pleased to have caught up with it all year so far. I also got a nice stash parcel the other day with several small charts and lots of threads. The threads were for up coming Chatelaine designs-suprise suprise. But I also decided to treat myself to the WDW for Lizzie Kate's Snippit Meow so that will likely be a small up coming WIP soon too.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Busy day and MSN 7

Today has been so busy. I decided to go into town for a break and knew that I would need to try and finish the first part of an assignment today so I could move onto study week 2 tomorrow. Well after about 6/7 hours the assignment is done-don't know how well but its done as there is a limit of what you can put in 300 words. Thats actually what I found hardest condensing it all down-leaves no room for waffle lol.
Added to that I haven't been feeling great for a few days. I seem to have a virus which I have had on and off for awhile but for the last 4/5 days I have had swollen glands and neuralgia. I don't feel ill as such, just tired and sore is the best way to describe my head.
One piece of good news is I finally got MSN 7. It hasn't let me sign in previously without getting a message that I am stuck behind a firewall lol. Even the MSN site said they didn't know a fix when I Googled the error message. But I tried again and found another forum with a possible solution and it worked so now I can be as animated as everyone else.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Quick update

Dialysis was fine today and the machines are back to normal so thats one less thing to worry about.
I decided to get some studying done this afternoon as I felt reasonably ok so lay down with my text book to read and promptly fell asleep. I didn't even realise I was that tired, but have alot of missed sleep to catch up on.
I also finished my Jane Green book, so will be off to bed soon and pick anoter out of my collection to start.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

What a few days

Well its been an eventful few days and I am not sure where to start. As you know I started my OU course and I am about half way through the first week and I am really enjoying it. I got my first assignment back on Monday which although counts for nothing as its only a practice I was keen to do it. Firstly I wanted to make sure that I set it all out correctly and as it is submitted via email I fet it necessary to check all that worked. So I rattled it off last Thursday as I joined late and my tutor wanted it asap if it was to be done. Well as I say it was returned on Monday and the comments were positive and I would have passed if it was graded, so thats given me a big boost.
The weekend wasn't easy as it was the annual conference to do with the group I left and as I helped set it up I still want it to do well. I chose not to attend this year but I understand all went well and the group is pushing forward. Also the last week hasn't been easy as its the anniversary of Sara going into hospital and of the last time I visited which was all over the conference last year. Lots of bad memories have been coming in but also some good ones are coming back so that is good.
But today was beyond anything I could have hoped for. I went to clinic and felt in need of not mentioning it as I wanted to go and then post the news. I sincerely expected it to not be great but I couldn't have been more wrong. My consultant has referred me to the transplant surgeon because they think there is a high probability they can do something. Its also looking very possible that what they do may not be far off the usual kind of transplant and other surgeons maybe willing to have a go. I was under the impression only one was prepared to look at me so this is a bonus but raises some questions as to why they didn't look into all this earlier.
However my mum and me made it very clear to my consultant that had I not changed to him nothing would be happening in this direction and how grateful we are to him for pursuing it and getting this far. I must admit mum was quite choked but I was just gobsmacked as I fully expected to hear bad news or none at all today.
So a weird few days with quite a mixture of emotions going on but for now all is right with the world. Of course we have to face dialysis tomorrow and if its like yesterday I shall not be happy:11 out of 15 machines broke down because of a new filter that was poorly fitted over the weekend caused problems. My machine was ok but this was a double edged sword as to get everyone else working properly 3 people had to come off and go home. Of course being on the first shift with an ok machine I had done longest so although I was home early I only had 2 hours 40 mins dialysis as opposed to 4 hours. I also came off with .9 litres extra on so have been very careful with my fluid intake since. As I understand it the machines are ok as long as the maximum number of 12 are going at any one time. Thats ok on the afternoon as they only have 12 patients. Today I don't know what happened but as everyone ended up doing less yesterday that can't happen tomorrow, so if there are more problems we may have to be farmed out to other units. Watch this space for an update tomorrow.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

October 1st

This is a significant date as it signalled the start of my course and the start of Medieval town Mandala (MTM), plus the next part of all the other mysteries I am in. So today I did a couple of hours study and then stitched on MVIII part 10. This part is going fast actually so I may get to start MTM this month as well.
I didn't make the tutorial today as I still feel very weak and wobbly in the legs, but actually feel fairly well in myself but my body is physically letting me down today, so I did manage 2 1/2 hours of study and I really enjoyed it.
Tonight I have updated all my blog stuff that is to do with months and seasons as I can't have a summer blinkie anymore as its no good pretending that its still summer out there. So my autumn blinkie is there, along with my October calender and october blinkie in its rack.
Tomorrow my brother is coming over for the afternoon with his girl friend but other than that it will be a stitching day with maybe a bit of study and surfing the net thrown in.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

A small finish

At the beginning of the week I knew it was going to be impossible to get my Autumn garden sampler finished this month so started this in a bid to get a finish each month:

I got this from Amanda in one of the stitchers exchanges and it was a really quick and fun stitch. I have decided that all the little finishes I have can be used on cards so I can combine both my hobbies in one.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

An apology

Just a quick note to say I am still around but haven't blogged much this week as I have felt really depressed. It is the time of year I know as this is significant for many reasons and none of them good. I was even tempted to pull out of the OU course yesterday as I was so down but I am determined that its going to be good for me so will press on. I do really want to do it anyway and to give up at this point would be so foolish just because I am down and having a crisis of confidence.
But its a good thing I didn't pull out as all my OU stuff arrived and boy did it arrive with a vengance. I got home from dialysis to find 2 parcels and 4 letters and my tutor had also phoned. He phoned me back and he seems great-really laid back and understanding but also very enthusiastic too. There is so much stuff to absorb but I have registered online at the forum and there is one meeting in Bristol on Saturday which is optional but recommended. At the moment I am fighting a cold virus so that combined with nerves means I may not make it but I am going to try and get there if I can as that would also help to boost my confidence.
Anyway not alot more is happening at the moment but just wanted to check in with you all and say hello.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

MVIII center done

Well I have finished the optional center for MVIII so now have 6 days to finish my Autumn garden and one more rotation piece. I am including 2 photos of MVIII this time. The first shows the overall look of the piece and the second is a close up of the stitched center:

I am really suprised at how long that middle bit took as it is only small, but the speciality stitches and the backstitching in treasure braid and gold overlaying took ages.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Its been quite some 24 hours

And I am exhasuted. At lunchtime yesterday I got a text from a lady whos daughter aged 17 who is a member of the group I left had been called in for a possible kidney transplant. Well last night it went ahead and today it is going quite well and so far so good. I then had a late night for various reasons, mainly catching up on emails and message boards so had a rather late night for me.
Then I was up early today and off into town, forgetting that an international clown festival was taking place. I missed most of the clowns but there were a few strange sights in the high street of people who obviously were part of it or had really gone to town with getting into the spirit of it. In town I did some banking bought 4 items from an impromtu half price Next sale-3 tops and a denaim skirt and also got a couple of papercraft magazines.
This afternoon I tried the new technique I saw at the show on Thursday and whilst I will say it didn't turn out great for a first effort it wasn't that bad either. At this point I decided to have a move around of my stitching and papercraft stash and decide whether I wanted to trade or sell anything else. That turned into a mammoth feat and one I was soon regretting but am glad I persevered as I can shut my wardrobe door again.
Which brings us to now, when I have sat down with a nice cup of tea, a chocolate biscuit and a few sweets to read the message boards and to blog.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

MVIII Part 9 done

I did manage to finish this tonight and here is a picture:

I managed to cut off the two snowflakes at the top but it gives a general idea, and once I have done the stitched center I will upload another picture.

Back from the show!!

It was a good one this year and I thoroughly enjoyed it.:-) Even though my foot is still broken my mobility is much better now than it was at the Shepton Mallett show in April, so thats a really good positive improvement for my general health.
The only downside to the show is that they didn't have so many needlework stands. This show has also been overtaken by card making, papercrafting and scrapbooking stuff as well as other arts and crafts. Luckily I am really into card making so found lots of things to drool over and really enjoyed browsing the craft items with mum.
I ended up not spending a huge amount although I could have gone mad. In the end I got some stitckers and embellishments for card making and a kit of a new technique. I can't remember the name of it now. Basically it allows you to stamp over a previously inked surface and it gives it sort of a relief look. There are other things to do with it but thats the start of the technique. That particular stand was absolutely breathtaking as it had the most wonderful array of hand made cards and tags to inspire you. It also had the most wonderful range of stamps and as part of this kit you got a choice of any stamp within a certain price range. I fell in love with one that was £5 more but the lady on the stand was saying you could have any and pay the extra, so that was the decider for me. This stamp is of a regal woman's head and shoulders and when I looked closer in the car it had the signs of the zodiac round her head in medallions.
I did fall in love with two cross stitch kits but decided to put them on a wish list in my head for the moment. They were both cat ones. The first being one of a cat and fairy by Janlynn which I have always liked. When I saw it up close the cat was sparkly as if he had been sprinkled with fairy dust which was really sweet and not something I had noticed before. I nearly bought this at a show before but it had sold out, but I don't regret it as I can buy it online at some point if I run out of stuff to stitch. The other cat design was a new one I had seen online by Lesley Ann Ivory. It is of a tabby cat in an Art Deco border. The cat is very realistic and the border was lovely too.
I also loved looking at the Michael Powell cross stitch stuff and could have succumbed there as well. I loved Secret garden I and all the Hand made houses as well as the chalet in the snow and many others lol.
Its been a really lovely day, with good weather and great company but its likely to be the last show this season. I know I won't be able to make Ally Pally as that will be too much on my foot. I am debating meeting some friends at Harrogate at the end of November but will have to look into finances and see what my foot is like in a few weeks before I make a decision.
Now I am officially pooped but do want to try and finish MVIII part 9 tonight if I can as I am 'that' close to it.:-)

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Lovely stitchy day

Today I have had a real me day. I started off with a lie in and then once sorted I finished my round on The Castle and after lunch and some surfing I stitched on the Autumn garden until tea. After that I did a little on MVIII. I just have half a gate and two snowflakes to do then I am onto the centre ornament.
So my goals for September are to finish Autumn garden, both parts of MVIII and at a push my last rotation piece. Then we are into October when everything changes as my course starts and will have to have a whole different timetable to my life.
On Thursday I am hoping to go to a local cross stitch/creative crafts show in Exeter. That is about an hour from me and for awhile I wasn't sure I would get there because of my foot. Well on that front I only use the crutches when I have done lots of walking and I am even spending time pottering in the house in my old trainers which less than a month ago I couldn't put on because it was too uncomfortable. So although the progress is slow it is sure and while I can still see improvement I will be relatively happy.
One other stupid thing I need to mention is the use of the words 'old trainers'. After much searching I found some lovely new ones and happened to be wearing them when I broke my foot. Mum said to me she wasn't sure I would ever wear them again and I must admit this is likely as I had only worn them once or twice before this happened-is that stupid or what?

Monday, September 19, 2005

Started something new

I had a good sort through my stitching stash yesterday and happened on Victoria Samplers Autumn Garden. I also checked the thread agains a small piece of Silkweaver Parkland which worked so I started this afternoon.
I must be getting old as I sat in my room with the sun streaming through the window and listening to radio 2. I felt so relaxed and I am going to try and do this every afternoon for a little while. This design I am hoping will be my September finish and I think thats quite doable as some of the bands look as if they will go quickly. Of course now I am back into liking band samplers and already I am eying the winter garden version-esp as it has a snowman in it.
Yesterday I also sorted out my winter/Christmas stitching and every year I do this and most years I don't even stitch half of what I plan to. Two years ago was the first and last time I ever stitched everything I planned for Christmas but all other stitching went out the window and I don't reall want to do that again.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Procrastination over

Well I been and gone and did it. I have filled in my registration form and application for financial support with the OU and it looks like come October I will be a student again.
Now I have done it I am actually quite excited and looking forward to the challenge of it. I think emotionally I will cope as I will now have a focus rather than my brain trying to be in turmoil over something I cannot change.
Its a new chapter in my life and I intend to embrace it fully.


Saw this on Lorna's blog and had to do it. You highlight those you have done then add something on the end:

I am bisexual.
I am homosexual.
I've run away from home.
I listen to political music.
I collect comic books.
I shut others out when I'm sad.
I open up to others easily.
I am keeping a secret from the world.
I watch the news.
I own over 5 rap CDs.
I own an ipod.
I own something from Hot Topic.
I love Disney movies.
I am a sucker for hair/eyes.
I don't kill bugs.
I curse regularly.
I have "x"s in my screen name.
I've slipped out a "lol" in a real conversation.
I love Spam.
I bake well.
I would wear pajamas to school.
I own something from Abercrombie.
I have a job.
I love Martha Stewart.
I am in love with someone.
I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
I am self conscious.
I like to laugh.
I smoke a pack a day.
I loved Go Ask Alice.
I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
I can't swallow pills.
I have many scars. Goes with the territory of any kidney patient
I've been out of this country.
I believe in ghosts.
I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
I am really ticklish.
I love chocolate.
I bite my nails.
I am comfortable with being me.
I play computer games/video games when I'm bored.
Gotten lost in the city.
Saw a shooting star.
I have had two serious surgical procedures. And the rest lol.
Gone out in public in my pajamas.
I have kissed a stranger.
Hugged a stranger.
Been in a fist fight with the same sex.
Been arrested.
Laughed and had milk/soda come out of your nose.
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
Made out in an elevator.
Sworn at my parents.
Kicked a guy where it hurts.
Been skydiving.
Been bungee jumping.
Broken a bone. Yep and don't I know it.
Played spin the bottle.
Gotten stitches.
Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
Bitten someone.
Been to Niagara Falls.
Gotten the chicken pox.
Crashed into a car.
Been to Asia.
Ridden in a taxi.
Been fired.
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back. Just a few times lol.
Stole something from my job.
Gone on a blind date.
Had a crush on a teacher/coach.
Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
Been to Europe.
Slept with a co-worker. Live here lol.
Been married.
Gotten divorced.
Saw someone dying. A couple of times. Never been present at a death but seen a few near it.
Been to Canada.
Been on a plane.
Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Thrown up in a bar.
Eaten Sushi.
Been snowboarding.
Been skiing.
Been ice skating.
Met someone in person from the internet. Many, many people and they are all great.
Been to a car show.
Going to or have gone to college.
Done hard drugs.
Taken painkillers.
Met a celebrity. Kind of-was on Blue Peter when I was 8 for their annual appeal-that year was dialysis so met Simon Groome.
I like playing practical jokes.
Been in a hot air balloon.
Had a totally selfish me day.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Procrastination time

I received my registration form from the OU today and found out that I can do it this October but I am having some second thoughts. I am still not always coping too well with what life has been throwing me and I am slightly concerned that this maybe a leap too far. On the other hand it could be the tonic I need and really get my brain focused on the future rather on that which has gone. The money is not a huge concern but it is of course a factor as it will be just over £500 to study this course alone. Maybe I am having an attack of the colly wobbles or its just that I never think straight on a dialysis day. I think I am always going to be nervous doing it and its a case of either now or never I think at the moment.
I am also procrastinating over fabric choices and one of these is for Chatelaines Japanese Garden, though ironically if I do the OU course I won't probably stitch this just yet anyway lol. Two birds with one stone come to mind here lol. Anyway my choices come down to two, both Silkweaver fabrics, one a mottled Exspressions and one a more solid Lugana. I have a few threads and a small cut of the Lugana so did a floss toss and it was great and I am sure it will work. The other is more a gut instinct as I haven't got the fabric or seen it in real life and still am not sure whether I would choose linen or evenweave. How much simpler but not so interesting life was when you only had white or cream to stitch on.
Not alot is happening elsewhere but it is my brothers birthday tomorrow which reminds me I promised mum several hours ago to send him an e card. Oooops.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Half way through MVIII

I finished the second gate way last night so am now half way through part 9. So seeing as I ahd the first week of September not stitching I am doing well and have every confidence I will keep up this month.
I started my next rotation piece which was Teresa Wentzlers The Castle this morning and am really pleased as to how this rotation is working. It is my 3rd time through now and I am not bored or fed up with it in the least so will carry on as although I am not finishing anything good progress is being made on 5 designs.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Christmas stash

My two kits from Ebay came today and they are both really cute. Going to try and work out which fabric to put them on in a bit. I fancy using a hand dyed for both of these.
I have been trying to work out which fabric to use for Chatelaines Japanese Garden and thought I had it narrowed down but have since found several more and one of which quite excited me.
Other than that life is much the same as its always been but I am actively looking at things to do to mark my 30th.:-)

Monday, September 12, 2005

Not much to report

Everything is fairly quiet so will give a brief stitching update and leave it there. MVIII is coming along slowly but surely and I have now started the second gate-they actually go quite quickly so should get this part and hopefully the centre done this month. Tomorrow I will finish up this rotation round on Santa of the forest and I am loving it and hope it will be done by Christmas 2006-but watch this space.

Saturday, September 10, 2005


Today has got me realising that memories can be both good and bad. This morning my uncle and aunt came over and we sat talking about the years gone by and looking at old photos. I really enjoyed this and it made me appreciate the good stuff in life.
This afternoon now they have left has got me thinking about something that happened recently which has stirred some nasty memories back up and combined with the op and the cold has laid me very low this week. I am coming back up both physically and mentally which is a god thing as I have to go and get my brothers birthday present asap. I have a week, but we are not sure if we are visiting as yet next weekend so may have to factor in postage time.
Talking of postage I have just ordered two cute Christmas kits off ebay. The Newton's Law one which I mentioned a few days ago and the Humphrey's Corner one. I am pretty sure the Humphrey one was a free design given in a magazine last year but I don't have it anywhere so have plumped for the full kit from the same seller as Newton.
I have stitched a bit on MVIII today and am 1/4 through this part and plan to stitch some more on it later.
My OU stuff didn't come in time, so I can't join now until February so its a winter of stitching by the fire for me. Although this is appealing I was looking forward to having my brain stretched a bit. Oh well maybe I should look at getting a new hobby or something instead or failing that just buy some more Chatelaines with the extra cash.:-)

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Nice stash order

Yesterday I put in a nice order for stash from Stitching Bits N Bobs. I got all the threads needed for my Lizzie Kate Meow Flippit, some more threads for future Chatelaine projects as they were 25% off and some little charts.
Today I haven't done a whole lot as I feel pretty rough. I seem to be shattered from the op, have a cold coming on and the last week in many ways has been rather stressful so am coming down from all that too. I was supposed to go to the dentist to have the gum boil checked and the whole lot deep cleaned but have postponed to Tuesday in the hopes I will feel much better then.
Tonight I am going to try for an earlish one and see if I can start to feel better tomorrow.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Back again

It won't be a long post today as I am shattered but wanted to just say I am back and fine. Yesterday I ended up having a general anaesthetic in theatre then was later moved to the X-ray department to have the dye part of the test. When I actually got there I was booked in for two places lol but eventually after many phone calls and decision making they found the best route to suit me because in several ways I was not likely to act in a normal way for this test. They got me sorted eventually and it all kicked off around 1:30pm and everything had been done by about 4:00pm and I was allowed home at 7:00pm so not bad going all in all. I saw alot of the hospital as I started off in main reception, moved to the day theatre reception, then the day theatre ward, the theatre itself was next, then into recovery, back to the ward, down to X-ray and finally back to a Urology ward. Poor mum who stayed as it wasn't worth driving home was getting quite confused but managed to catch up with me at each place eventually lol. She wasn't allowed to theatre or X-ray obviously but somehow managed to get to the right ward at the right time to meet me.
I have just about managed to add my September calender as well today but am already looking into Christmas decorating lol.
Anyway really tired now so will start blogging again properly tomorrow.

Monday, September 05, 2005

Well its all changed again

Today we had the horrible thought that if this test was being done under a local anaesthetic that could point to an epidural so decided to ring up and check and no its being done under heavy sedation. I really wish they would make up their minds about it but this time tomorrow it will all be over one way or another. This means I maybe won't get to post tomorrow but it really depends how groggy I am.
I am also so tired from the weekend that I stumbled through the afternoon and then fell asleep for an hour before dinner and still feel shattered tonight so its going to be an early one. I am in two minds as I have been advised not to eat and drink from midnight and I could really do with an early night but also could possibly benefit from a late snack-think the early night is going to win this time though.
Not much else to report, spent the morning sorting out paperwork for my admission tomorrow which turned into a complex procedure as one of my drugs was changed 2 weeks ago but no one told me and no one knows why. As luck would have it my consultant is down at the unit tomorrow so can advise what is going on as according to the computer it also wasn't sanctioned by him.
I am feeling a bit flat after the time I spent on things leading up to the fun day and now its all over things have gone fairly quiet and I am sure it will hit me once I am not so tired. Also my OU stuff hasn't arrived and its not looking like I can get it back in time to start in October now as the deadline is only a few days away. I really have no one to blame but myself for procrastinating over it so long but I thought registering online guaranteed a place whereas you have to then receive the pack and arrange the finances by the cut off date to get a place. Oh well I can always use the next few months to really get into my stitching and start with the OU in February and try and catch up and not take a break between courses if I do miss this deadline.
I do sometimes wonder if I am up to it anyway as it doesn't take alot to pull me down at the moment and what occurred with the group I left still weighs extremely heavily on my mind. I really think apart from one or two none of them have any idea how ill I became with the stress of it. Part of that is that they do not realise how close me and Sara were and I think they believe I should be healed by now. But if the truth is told the kind of friendship I had with Sara is the kind most people crave but rarely get. This is the sort that even though you have known each other a short time it could have been a lifetime as you have shared so much and talked about anything and everything and you just think so alike and that although we are very different people its like meeting a kindred spirit. I know I have one other friend who comes near to this who I have known longer but there was something extra special about this friendship which makes it even harder to lose.
Anyway before I start to cry and get maudlin again I am going to go now and get a drink and prepare for what tomorrow might hold.

Sunday, September 04, 2005


I am back home now but utterly knackered. It was more than worthwhile and we made lots of money and had an absolute ball. I met up with lots of people I haven't met for ages and really had a very good time.
As for my cards they were not a complete damp squid. I sold about 20+ to friends and strangers but unfortunately we run out of tables so they had to be crammed in on other peoples stalls so didn't get the hard sell I hoped they would. But I am more than pleased that people seemed very impressed with the ones they did see and the people saying it weren't friends of mine lol.
It has also helped to heal some wounds about the group I left as some of the people involved were there but I realise I have a way to go yet and what the future holds I will wait and see.
As for the appointment on Tuesday I received an ammended letter but that says it will be done under a local anasthetic but I was expecting a general one. Think I need to just turn up and see what will happen and go from there lol.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Looks like the hospital is sorted

Well finally got the dialysis Sister to try and find out what was going on today and I am going in on Tuesday for the same test under anaesthetic. Although I am a bit confused at the moment as she spoke to someone who was going to ring her back, couldn't get hold of the unit so rang my home instead. My mum rang the Sister to tell her the plan but what the Sister told me is not what mum was told. DOH!! I think its possible they may have been more forthcoming with her in that first phone call so at the moment I am probably having an anaesthetic but theres a possibility I won't need one according to the Sister lol. I still wouldn't be suprised if the whole lot was cancelled once I arrived on Tuesday but I will turn up and see what happens.
My stitching is coming along great and I have a quarter of a gate done on MVIII Part 9 and its really pretty so can't wait to see the full effect. I also got some stash today:My fabric from Silkweavers for Chatelaine's Medieval Town Mandala which seems a bit darker so I am keeping my fingers crossed it will be ok. I also got some Gloriana's and Waterlillies towards the next two Mandala Gardens with Lizzie Kate's Snippets-woof and Meow, so all in all a good stash day.
I may not get a chance to post again now until at least Sunday and depending on tiredness levels after tomorrow it could be Monday so I hope everyone has a great weekend whatever they're doing and will catch you all soon.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

On the countdown now

Saturday is nearly upon us and with that in mind I spent the morning at the site of the fun day being shown round and generally helping with some preparations. Its a really lovely place and I am proud to have managed to help out as much as I was able to considering how low I got just a month or so ago. Not only have I made 64 cards-want to get that figure to 70 but not sure I will manage that, I managed to secure a couple of decent prizes for the raffle by emailing various companies and made some signs for the day.
Onto other stuff:Stitching wise I completed 2 out of 3 goals last month-finished Part 8 of MVIII and a small design. But I failed on finishing parts 1 and 2 of Midi I but always thought that was a bit ambitious and have got a fair amount done so shouldn't, fingers crossed, be slugging away on this for years. The new parts for both mysteries are now out and I got ridiculously excited to see we are stitching gates for part 9 of MVIII. Last years mystery was gazebos and although I still love the design I particularly like the designs with wrought iron gates in them so that was a bonus this time. We also got the stitched centrepiece which is absolutely beautiful so I can't wait to get cracking.
I rang the hospital again about my appointment next week and it does seem like some kind of mistake has been made so I am again waiting to hear back on whether it will be on Tuesday as I probably do need a bed after all. I think under these circumstances I would rather be asleep as I don't want pain and I think this test with my anatomy the way it is, it's very likely to hurt.:-( So I am waiting again to see what is happening but I would put good money on it being postponed until a later date-watch this space.

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Well I just did it

Well folks I just signed up for my first OU course. If they get everything back in time for me to send it back by the deadline I will start in October. As I am incapacitated at the moment I will have even more time and should still be able to fit my stitching in too lol.
I have chosen to study An introduction to Humanities which will last 9 months and give me 60 credits towards a degree if I decide to go on and study for one. I will get a Certificate if I pass this course successfully so in 9 months I maybe able to put letters after my name lol.
I am excited and scared and nervous all at the same time but am looking forward to this change of gear in my life, even if I have to give up some stitching time for it lol.
There is a storm brewing round here at the moment with thunder and lightening rumbling around but the long range forecast still looks promising for the weekend.:-)

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

I really don't believe it

I attended the fracture clinic this morning and would you believe it-its STILL not healed. I got a fascinating insight into breaks in the foot of all kinds this morning as I saw the consultant who had a student with her. This break is apparantly one of the most difficult to heal and the other break that is common with my type of fall is a quick healer-trust me eh.
So what does all of the above mean? Well I go back in 3 months and in the meantime I have to be cautious with it, wear shoes that are comfortable and take it easy. The news could have been worse as sometimes the break doesn't heal on its own and what happens then I rather not imagine. However the consultant said she thinks mine is probably not in that catergory as it appeared I was making new bone so thats something to be thankful for. As for my glamorous shoe-I am still wearing it for longer walks to give my foot the best chance it can get.
Other than that I stitched a bit on Midi I and rang the hospital to query next weeks test in case some sort of mistake has been made. I am now waiting for them to ring me back.
I may go and make some more cards and banners in a bit-now made 60, but had a request last night for a wedding one so will see what I can do.

Monday, August 29, 2005

Bit stressed

Last night bought the news that my friend is back in ICU after developing a chest infection. I was just starting to relax on this front as well, so now we wait for news again.
Dialysis today was smooth and this afternoon I am having a quiet one and will probably go and stitch in a bit. I am still plugging away on Midi I and its coming on now and although I won't catch up, I am not going to be behind by too much so thats something.
Saturday is looming and it is turning into a good social event as we are having a impromptu party and sleepover after all the hard work is out of the way which will be something to look forward too.
The next couple of weeks are almost completely booked up at the moment and my social life is like buses ie nothing happening and then everything happens at once.:-)

Sunday, August 28, 2005


This afternoon me and mum got the cards for the fundraiser priced and labelled and here as follows are some pictures as promised:

This is by no means all of them but gives an idea that there will be a varied selection on the day. Now I just have to hope that some of them get sold.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Nice day

I decided to have a day at home today just doing what I wished for a bit. So with that in mind I finished MVI rotation piece this afternoon whilst watching the Coronation Street omnibus on ITV 2.
Then after that I made 8 more cards towards the fun day so the total now stands at around 50/51. Not sure of the exact number because different lists say different amounts lol, but this was my minimum I wanted to make so that is something else I can relax over now. The bunting I ordered for the fun day arrived today and its lovely and colourful and very good value thanks to wonderful Ebay.
After dinner I stitched on Midi I and chatted on the phone to a friend. I am now on here for awhile before bed uploading the MVI photos and catching up on the message boards.
One small incident this morning has left me reeling a bit:I got my appointment for the test to have my ureters looked at but now have to ring them up. The name of the test has changed though I think this one is similar but the crucial thing is I am now going to be awake. This is generally preferable to a general anaesthetic but I am frightened I will be in the pain I was in when I had this or a similar test years ago. You see we know for a fact that my left ureter has nowhere to go as the kidney didn't develop and that ureter is a dead end. We found this out on that test years ago as the dye that was put in had nowhere to go then and I am hoping that as they know about this it has been taken into account this time around. If this test goes ahead it is only 10 days away which is good as things are moving quickly but also a bit scary as that is sooner than I anticipated and once you have that date the countdown begins.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Having a chilled day

I think I have rather over done stuff the last few weeks so I am taking the chance to just be quiet today and recharge my batteries. Next week promises to be a busy and in some respects difficult week as I don't have a day to myself until the Sunday. Tuesday I am back at the fracture clinic for more x-rays and assessments. This time the foot should be healed as it been out of plaster 6 weeks now and although it feels better it is certainly not perfect. I am expecting the worst but hoping for the best on that front. Thursday I am off to the country house where we are holding the fun day to help get some of the preparations underway. Then the Saturday is the day itself which I am both looking forward to and dreading. I am looking forward to it as its a great and positive thing to be doing in Sara's memory and it should also be lots of fun as well. But I am dreading it as I know it will be hard work which is not the real issue here as I am worried that no one will turn up, the weather will be bad etc etc. However the thing I am really starting to worry about is the group I left as some of the ex-members will be there and although we have communicated since and there is no animosity I just don't quite know how to handle them. I think alot of this stems from the fact that I am still so confused about everything that went on. Although I know it was right of me to leave when and why I did I think the day maybe emotional at the best of times without revisitng those old wounds as well.
I have been doing alot of thinking about lots of these issues and many surrounding them lately and although I am in less pain than I was emotionally I was pushed so far down that its going to take a long time to get back up again. However yesterday I felt ridiculously happy for most of the day so at least I know days like that are possible again. But its been tempered by a weepy day today which I imagine was inevitable especially as I dialysed which seems to make me more tired and weepy anyway.
This weekend is a bank holiday but it never really feels like one in this house as both my parents have retired and I still have to go for dialysis on Monday. However I always try and do something slightly out of the norm to make up for it. I was thinking of having a stitching weekend but thats not going to happen as I will be making last minute preparations for the fun day. This will be especially to do with my cards etc as they need pricing and labelling up as to what the greeting inside is. I will post a picture of them all at some point. I am at 42 made cards now and hope to get to 50 by Sunday and that will be it then.
Tonight I am chilling out with Midi I and generally relaxing as much as possible.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Busy day

Well its been a busy one today. I got up early and got to my doctors appointment and was out of that early enough to get some shopping done in town. Then it was off to the hairdressers for a trim and a consultation for something I have in mind for my 30th birthday.;-)
After that I came home and popped online to check emails and find some bunting for the fun day next week. I have some really colourful stuff coming from ebay which was cheap and free postage as well so thats another thing to cross off the list.
After lunch I made 5 more cards for the fun day and am finally sitting down with a cuppa and a choccie biscuit checking the message boards before dinner and then some more stitching on Midi I.
Midi I is coming along well although I won't catch up before the next part is out as I am so busy with other stuff at the moment, but it grows fast and I am confident I can get a good amount done in the next week.
Nearly forgot that it is an anniversary of sorts here today. I started this kind of dialysis 6 years ago today and its not a great anniversary but its still quite noteworthy in some ways.:-)

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

A peaceful day

Today has passed without incident which is a good thing as tomorrow looks set to be ultra busy. I managed to arrange two appointments within an hour of each other tomorrow morning and then want to make some more cards for the fun day in the afternoon.
Talking of cards I managed to make 8 today and went for the simple stickers, peel offs and ribbons approach and they have come out quite well. I must post a picture of them all when I have bagged and labelled them all. I spent alot of last night doing the first batch and nearly 2 hours later I had done aroudn 25. I still need to price them and put a lable on telling the buyer what the message inside says-most often its blank or best wishes to maximise sales lol. At least if none get bought on the Sat I won't have to buy another card for several years lol.
Tonight is a good tv night so I plan to sit and stitch on Midi I and have a good old chill out session.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

A tiny finish

After yesterday's events at the unit I am feeling pretty rough today so felt in need of a small cute stitch. So after looking through my freebies I found this Cattitude cat by Margaret Sherry. I love this range but it is so far the only one I have stitched. It was from a free chart that origianlly came with Cross Stitcher magazine and is designed to be made into a scissor fob but I think mine will probably get added to a card at some point.
I am finding myself going through a phase of being attracted to cute designs and am likely to order the new Newton's Law Christmas kit. I did the one last year and this years is very different but still lovely and so cute. After going through my freebies from magazines which were almost without exception of the cute variety I am being drawn to Humphrey's corner again. I also haven't stitched one of these but am tempted to get one.
What I am suddenly noticing though is many of the new Christmas kits for Humphrey's Corner, and Tatty Teddy were free exclusive designs in magazines last year. Even Newton's Law has 3 out that were free in magazines at the beginning of the year out. These were also exclusives at the time and were stitched for the Nation Kidney Research Fund and made into quilts for young dialysis patients to use nationwide. Now two things spring to mind here:

1. What does exclusive mean? I always thought it would be the one and only place to get the designs and if you missed that chart you couldn't then get it in another form at a later date.
2. To know that they were previous free charts in magazines does that mean that I read too many and also whether I hord alot when I also know I have those designs sat in my cupboard?

No other real news at the moment but I feel like doing a blog quiz so may try and find one and pop back later on.

Monday, August 22, 2005

Proof positive

Was shown today as to why we need new dialysis machines asap. The one I was on broke donw 1 1/2 hours in and I am known when there is a problem to go funny. Well I was jogging along nicely when all of a sudden my eyesight disappeared and I knew my BP was in my boots. But because of the dodgy machine they couldn't give me any fluid, and I knew with real conviction that if I didn't get any I would at the very least faint or possibly worse. They managed to squirt some in then got the machine up and running and got the fluid in and I felt much better-washed out but better. Then I got an old familiar pain which I haven't had for years in my groin which used to always make me sick and yes it followed the same pattern. Rule of thumb is patient being sick on dialysis give them fluid and I did also feel very clammy. The pain didn't go for ages and all I wanted to do was come home and curl up in bed. They agreed I could leave earlier if it carried on but it did eventually go and I felt reasonably ok so stuck it out until the end. This is not because I am brave lol but so that I would get the excess fluid off and then not go in too heavy on Wednesday, so barring the fact I had fluid back and couldn't take quite all off with all the problems I only came off .3 kilos over which for a Monday is fine.:-)
So what else have I done today, well felt pretty cruddy when I got home about 1:00pm had some lunch and then chilled but decided doing something may help. So I went to do some cards-and probably wasted more paper etc than I used but do have 2 more cards to show for it-now at 31 for the fun day. I have also been promised another 5 by an online friend whose daughter is in the group I used to help run, so that will boost it a bit too.:-0
Tonight if I feel reasonably ok I will stitch on Midi I and watch tv. There is a week of programmes on about the organ donor register which I may watch-find it very raw really considering I can't have a transplant. However they are usually quite informative and well done so will probably watch it to see. One thing that puzzles me is why these programmes were not on during national transplant week last month as it would have been an ideal time.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Taken me all day to realise

Well its taken me until just a few minutes ago that 6 years ago today I was admitted to hospital with the failure of one kind of dialysis which led to sudden extreme illness. In the wee small hours this escalated and I ended up in ICU for a day.
This date always makes me edgy as I have a thing about anniverseries etc. Last week it was even worse as a couple of the features that landed me in ICU is what my friend had but for very different reasons. When this combined with Sara being in ICU not so long ago I started having some major flashbacks whenever I thought about it-esp this time when I was texting updates to friends as this was how I used to often update people on Sara and these people are the same this time.:-(
I know I have a long way to go with this stress but I am getting there slowly but surely. Keeping busy is doing wonders and thats why this day has mostly gone without me feeling its significance.
So today I have stitched on MVI and made 4 more cards and tonight I plan to stitch on Midi I for a bit and then chill out online later.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

25 cards

No I haven't made that many today lol, but have got that many to contribute to the fundraising event 2 weeks today. I made 4 today and think I could probably get to around 50 by 2 weeks time if I go for some simple but effective designs.
Other than that I had a potter in to town, stitched a bit on Midi I and surfed online. I have been looking at the pictures of the GTG I had to miss and it looks like great fun and hope everyone enjoys themselves today. And for those off to Bakewell tomorrow hope you all enjoy that too and don't spend too much money.;-)

Friday, August 19, 2005

Good friends and family

For one reason or another the get together this weekend is not something I can get to. We have tried every which way around the situation and my parents offered to drive a 3 hour round trip to meet up with another bulletin border. But with view of my foot and my health which is excellent for a kidney patient at the moment its best to leave it. While I have good health I shouldn't jepodise it so I will do some more stuff for the fund raising day and stitch instead. Its a decision I am happy with and right for me and thats all you can do in this life.
Other than that there is good news about my friend in ICU. He has been out for a few days and stayed out, although there have been set backs and all is not A1 yet but its looking like its a slow but sure recovery. There is also good news on the personal front in that I am staying strong with the group and despite the fact I am needed I am not going back as certain things don't need to be revisited at this point in time.
I am also seriously considering the OU course again. I have until August 31st to decide so will maybe use my free weekend to really read up and decide.

Night all. :-)

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Busy day

I have been to see a friend who had a transplant in November of last year and she is doing really well. We sat and drank tea, ate food and gossiped, so its been a really nice chilled out day. Tonight I am stitching on Midi I and chilling out some more. I am hoping for a relatively early night tonight but will try and stay up for an update on my friend who is ill, but they tend to come a bit earlier now so I should hopefully get to bed by 11:00pm at the latest. All being well tomorrow is likely to be busy so got to conserve my strength.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Busy but chilled

There were no water problems so on and off dialysis smoothly and relatively early.:-)
This afternoon I have sent some emails, chatted on the phone and generally chilled. I am off for a cup of tea and to make some more cards. Tonight I plan to stitch on Midi I which is slightly lacking so far. I am stitching part 1 and 2 together as it is easier for it to line up that way and looks like I have accomplished more overall.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Urrgghhh dentists

I suddenly ended up having an unsceduled visit to mine this morning. I hate them at the best of times but pain drove me there lol. I have had something that has felt like an ulcer since Friday and has been improving and getting worse at regular intervals. Last night I woke up at 5:00am and it was so painful that I couldn't turn over in bed and had a terrible throbbing on top and bottom teeth so off I went. It turns out it is a gum boil due to my wisdom tooth. :-( Apparently because my bottom left wisdom tooth was removed a few years ago the top one has nothing to rest on which makes it prone to infection. It doesn't mean it will have to come out but my dentist has warned me before that as they are also crowded they may all have to be removed. So its a weeks worth of antibiotics, then a deep clean in 3 weeks at my usual dental check up and see how its progressing.
The meal last night was really nice with a gooey ice cream pud yummmmyy. I suddenly felt shy for a bit but soon relaxed and got alot more sorted for the fundraising day. Its only 2 1/2 weeks away now eeekk but coming together nicely with just some bits and pieces to sort out and tick off the list.
Today I am working on this and stitching on MVI and hope you all have a great day as the sun is out and its looking good. :-)

Monday, August 15, 2005

Deja vu

Another dialysis another hours wait for the technician to come. Apparently a spare part is needed which ahs to come from Sweden so this could be a regular occurence for awhile. We didn't have time knocked off today either as it only happened on Friday and we had too much fluid to remove in a shorter time. Some people got away with half an hour less but I wasn't one of them and even then ended up with a bit of excess fluid on. Oh well on the flip side my BP is higher so thats something to be thankful for.
I am off for my meal in a few hours and really looking forward to the break away and a nice meal to boot.
I think I have finally decided on my fabric for Medieval Town Mandala and I think its going to be Parkland. I was just too worried about changing the count of fabric and some of the potential pitfalls of that. I did like Jobelan Lambswool but I think its a bit too dark as there is quite a bit of empty fabric and thinking about it Cookie Dough may have been the same. So Parkland Lugana it is and I will get that ordered very soon.
One other thing I forgot to Blog yesterday is my order at Stitching Bits n Bobs. I got 2 Lizzie Kate Flip its-a cat one and the dog version. I also ordered most of the Glorianas and Waterlilies needed for Japanese Garden and MXI. I usually buy the packages of these and ideally I want to get one each for my birthday and Christmas but they maybe a bit much if I haven't already got some of the threads. :-)

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Busy day

Today started leisurely enough with some stitching on my rotation piece MVI, but it sort of spiralled from there. As I was stitching mum noticed that my magazines were spilling out of control so I promised to sort them out. I knew they needed doing but her nudge was what I needed to get to it.
Before that I had a flash of inspiration for my fabric for Medieval town Mandala so went off to do some floss tossing. The piece I wanted to try was one I had put aside for TW's Fortunate traveller but I couldn't find it. I did find a piece of Brittany in Bone, a piece of Belfast in Paltinum and a piece of Jobelan Lambswool and tried them all. I also tried Lugana Parkland again and I think I am leaning to Parkland but on my pictured they all look good DOH!!!!
So that took us to lunch time and after lunch I surfed on the net for a bit, went to sort out the dreaded magazines and then tidied my room and did some paperwork. After that I stitched on MVI before and after tea, chatted to Richard on the phone and then went to make some cards.
So that took me to 9:30pm at which point I had a shower, dried my hair and here I am. Its been a mundane day in many respects but I love those just as much as active ones as it is nice to just do ordinary stuff from time to time.
This week my calender is pretty full, with a meal tomorrow night, meeting a friend for the day on Thursday and then the weekend away on Friday. :-) Tuesday will be a stitching and chilling day and to start making some plans/lists for the weekend.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

MVIII Part 8 completed

I have just finished Part 8 of MVIII this afternoon. I managed not to get any stitching done yesterday evening as I felt really down and actually ended up having a really good cry and missed the unveiling of the Big Brother winner. I was really disappointed about that but the cry and the long talk was needed so was worth itin the long run.
So here is my picture of Part 8:

This took quite alot longer that I anticipated and also I found the variegated thread a difficult one to match. This one kept changing colour so abruptly that I ended up hacking it to pieces to achieve the effect I wanted. In the end I used most colours that were in the thread just not always as they came off the skein. I started in error bottom right which was very light and bottom left turned alot darker so I stitched it so the opposite corners at the top would be similar in shading.
No other real news here except we had a wander into town this morning and I bought some magazines and a skirt. Tonight I plan to chill and stitch and generally try and relax.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Could have had a lie in

I hauled myself out of bed at 6:30am got to dialysis by 7:15am and was told there was a delay of at least an hour. Apparently one of the major components that makes all the machines safe and usuable failed completely and an technician was hot footing it down from Bristol. We all spent the time chatting and it was lovely because no one complained, everyone just accepted it and got on with it. I finally got on the machine at 8:50am and we all had an hour knocked off so I was actually finished on time.
A few things have also come to light this morning and they range from good to not so good. I am going to deal with the good first and they are that the surgeon I was referred to is on fairly equal footing with the one who refused to consider me. This means he maybe not have to seek full approval if he decides a transplant is viable. The choice of new machine for our unit has been narrowed from 3 to 2 and are going to be tested in Bristol for the consultants to see. The good news part is that one of them was the one I tried. :-)
Now onto the bad stuff which starts with those machines and that there is a rumour circulating that the funding is not there and we may not get them. The other thing is something I don't know whether to put it in this or the good catergory, but its to do with my BP. Something has gone awry with our scales which has been pointed out numerous times by one patient. He has a pair at home which always matched the units utterly and all of a sudden they stopped doing so and at the same time strange things started to happen. There were people complaining that the amount of fluid they had on wasn't correct, many who thought they were too dry and several who out of the blue developed BP problems. So on Wednesday after I left they were apparently calibrated which is a routine thing and were upto a Kilo out. This in all realism is only a couple of pounds in flesh weight, but if you think of it as a Litre bottle of water thats how much excess fluid was coming out of our system, so thats quite alot. This would also explain why people kept having drops of their BP as the scales were telling the nurses to remove that much extra each time.
My friend in ICU is making some good and significant progress which pleases me but for several reasons its all bought the group situation to light again and its come back to haunt me. It hadn't really ever gone but its bought it nearer the surface again and I realise again how much I allowed it to get to me.
But we all move onwards and upwards and tonight is the Big Brother grand finale. I am hoping to sit down and either finish MVIII Part 8 or make very big inroads into it so I can finish it tomorrow.
Finally hair watch:its looking ok today and I think I am gonna like it.:-)