Well I just did it

Well folks I just signed up for my first OU course. If they get everything back in time for me to send it back by the deadline I will start in October. As I am incapacitated at the moment I will have even more time and should still be able to fit my stitching in too lol.
I have chosen to study An introduction to Humanities which will last 9 months and give me 60 credits towards a degree if I decide to go on and study for one. I will get a Certificate if I pass this course successfully so in 9 months I maybe able to put letters after my name lol.
I am excited and scared and nervous all at the same time but am looking forward to this change of gear in my life, even if I have to give up some stitching time for it lol.
There is a storm brewing round here at the moment with thunder and lightening rumbling around but the long range forecast still looks promising for the weekend.:-)

I really don't believe it

I attended the fracture clinic this morning and would you believe it-its STILL not healed. I got a fascinating insight into breaks in the foot of all kinds this morning as I saw the consultant who had a student with her. This break is apparantly one of the most difficult to heal and the other break that is common with my type of fall is a quick healer-trust me eh.
So what does all of the above mean? Well I go back in 3 months and in the meantime I have to be cautious with it, wear shoes that are comfortable and take it easy. The news could have been worse as sometimes the break doesn't heal on its own and what happens then I rather not imagine. However the consultant said she thinks mine is probably not in that catergory as it appeared I was making new bone so thats something to be thankful for. As for my glamorous shoe-I am still wearing it for longer walks to give my foot the best chance it can get.
Other than that I stitched a bit on Midi I and rang the hospital to query next weeks test in case some sort of mistake has been made. I am now waiting for them to ring me back.
I may go and make some more cards and banners in a bit-now made 60, but had a request last night for a wedding one so will see what I can do.

Bit stressed

Last night bought the news that my friend is back in ICU after developing a chest infection. I was just starting to relax on this front as well, so now we wait for news again.
Dialysis today was smooth and this afternoon I am having a quiet one and will probably go and stitch in a bit. I am still plugging away on Midi I and its coming on now and although I won't catch up, I am not going to be behind by too much so thats something.
Saturday is looming and it is turning into a good social event as we are having a impromptu party and sleepover after all the hard work is out of the way which will be something to look forward too.
The next couple of weeks are almost completely booked up at the moment and my social life is like buses ie nothing happening and then everything happens at once.:-)

Cards

This afternoon me and mum got the cards for the fundraiser priced and labelled and here as follows are some pictures as promised:





This is by no means all of them but gives an idea that there will be a varied selection on the day. Now I just have to hope that some of them get sold.

Nice day

I decided to have a day at home today just doing what I wished for a bit. So with that in mind I finished MVI rotation piece this afternoon whilst watching the Coronation Street omnibus on ITV 2.
Then after that I made 8 more cards towards the fun day so the total now stands at around 50/51. Not sure of the exact number because different lists say different amounts lol, but this was my minimum I wanted to make so that is something else I can relax over now. The bunting I ordered for the fun day arrived today and its lovely and colourful and very good value thanks to wonderful Ebay.
After dinner I stitched on Midi I and chatted on the phone to a friend. I am now on here for awhile before bed uploading the MVI photos and catching up on the message boards.
One small incident this morning has left me reeling a bit:I got my appointment for the test to have my ureters looked at but now have to ring them up. The name of the test has changed though I think this one is similar but the crucial thing is I am now going to be awake. This is generally preferable to a general anaesthetic but I am frightened I will be in the pain I was in when I had this or a similar test years ago. You see we know for a fact that my left ureter has nowhere to go as the kidney didn't develop and that ureter is a dead end. We found this out on that test years ago as the dye that was put in had nowhere to go then and I am hoping that as they know about this it has been taken into account this time around. If this test goes ahead it is only 10 days away which is good as things are moving quickly but also a bit scary as that is sooner than I anticipated and once you have that date the countdown begins.

Having a chilled day

I think I have rather over done stuff the last few weeks so I am taking the chance to just be quiet today and recharge my batteries. Next week promises to be a busy and in some respects difficult week as I don't have a day to myself until the Sunday. Tuesday I am back at the fracture clinic for more x-rays and assessments. This time the foot should be healed as it been out of plaster 6 weeks now and although it feels better it is certainly not perfect. I am expecting the worst but hoping for the best on that front. Thursday I am off to the country house where we are holding the fun day to help get some of the preparations underway. Then the Saturday is the day itself which I am both looking forward to and dreading. I am looking forward to it as its a great and positive thing to be doing in Sara's memory and it should also be lots of fun as well. But I am dreading it as I know it will be hard work which is not the real issue here as I am worried that no one will turn up, the weather will be bad etc etc. However the thing I am really starting to worry about is the group I left as some of the ex-members will be there and although we have communicated since and there is no animosity I just don't quite know how to handle them. I think alot of this stems from the fact that I am still so confused about everything that went on. Although I know it was right of me to leave when and why I did I think the day maybe emotional at the best of times without revisitng those old wounds as well.
I have been doing alot of thinking about lots of these issues and many surrounding them lately and although I am in less pain than I was emotionally I was pushed so far down that its going to take a long time to get back up again. However yesterday I felt ridiculously happy for most of the day so at least I know days like that are possible again. But its been tempered by a weepy day today which I imagine was inevitable especially as I dialysed which seems to make me more tired and weepy anyway.
This weekend is a bank holiday but it never really feels like one in this house as both my parents have retired and I still have to go for dialysis on Monday. However I always try and do something slightly out of the norm to make up for it. I was thinking of having a stitching weekend but thats not going to happen as I will be making last minute preparations for the fun day. This will be especially to do with my cards etc as they need pricing and labelling up as to what the greeting inside is. I will post a picture of them all at some point. I am at 42 made cards now and hope to get to 50 by Sunday and that will be it then.
Tonight I am chilling out with Midi I and generally relaxing as much as possible.

Busy day

Well its been a busy one today. I got up early and got to my doctors appointment and was out of that early enough to get some shopping done in town. Then it was off to the hairdressers for a trim and a consultation for something I have in mind for my 30th birthday.;-)
After that I came home and popped online to check emails and find some bunting for the fun day next week. I have some really colourful stuff coming from ebay which was cheap and free postage as well so thats another thing to cross off the list.
After lunch I made 5 more cards for the fun day and am finally sitting down with a cuppa and a choccie biscuit checking the message boards before dinner and then some more stitching on Midi I.
Midi I is coming along well although I won't catch up before the next part is out as I am so busy with other stuff at the moment, but it grows fast and I am confident I can get a good amount done in the next week.
Nearly forgot that it is an anniversary of sorts here today. I started this kind of dialysis 6 years ago today and its not a great anniversary but its still quite noteworthy in some ways.:-)

A peaceful day

Today has passed without incident which is a good thing as tomorrow looks set to be ultra busy. I managed to arrange two appointments within an hour of each other tomorrow morning and then want to make some more cards for the fun day in the afternoon.
Talking of cards I managed to make 8 today and went for the simple stickers, peel offs and ribbons approach and they have come out quite well. I must post a picture of them all when I have bagged and labelled them all. I spent alot of last night doing the first batch and nearly 2 hours later I had done aroudn 25. I still need to price them and put a lable on telling the buyer what the message inside says-most often its blank or best wishes to maximise sales lol. At least if none get bought on the Sat I won't have to buy another card for several years lol.
Tonight is a good tv night so I plan to sit and stitch on Midi I and have a good old chill out session.

A tiny finish

After yesterday's events at the unit I am feeling pretty rough today so felt in need of a small cute stitch. So after looking through my freebies I found this Cattitude cat by Margaret Sherry. I love this range but it is so far the only one I have stitched. It was from a free chart that origianlly came with Cross Stitcher magazine and is designed to be made into a scissor fob but I think mine will probably get added to a card at some point.
I am finding myself going through a phase of being attracted to cute designs and am likely to order the new Newton's Law Christmas kit. I did the one last year and this years is very different but still lovely and so cute. After going through my freebies from magazines which were almost without exception of the cute variety I am being drawn to Humphrey's corner again. I also haven't stitched one of these but am tempted to get one.
What I am suddenly noticing though is many of the new Christmas kits for Humphrey's Corner, and Tatty Teddy were free exclusive designs in magazines last year. Even Newton's Law has 3 out that were free in magazines at the beginning of the year out. These were also exclusives at the time and were stitched for the Nation Kidney Research Fund and made into quilts for young dialysis patients to use nationwide. Now two things spring to mind here:

1. What does exclusive mean? I always thought it would be the one and only place to get the designs and if you missed that chart you couldn't then get it in another form at a later date.
2. To know that they were previous free charts in magazines does that mean that I read too many and also whether I hord alot when I also know I have those designs sat in my cupboard?

No other real news at the moment but I feel like doing a blog quiz so may try and find one and pop back later on.

Proof positive

Was shown today as to why we need new dialysis machines asap. The one I was on broke donw 1 1/2 hours in and I am known when there is a problem to go funny. Well I was jogging along nicely when all of a sudden my eyesight disappeared and I knew my BP was in my boots. But because of the dodgy machine they couldn't give me any fluid, and I knew with real conviction that if I didn't get any I would at the very least faint or possibly worse. They managed to squirt some in then got the machine up and running and got the fluid in and I felt much better-washed out but better. Then I got an old familiar pain which I haven't had for years in my groin which used to always make me sick and yes it followed the same pattern. Rule of thumb is patient being sick on dialysis give them fluid and I did also feel very clammy. The pain didn't go for ages and all I wanted to do was come home and curl up in bed. They agreed I could leave earlier if it carried on but it did eventually go and I felt reasonably ok so stuck it out until the end. This is not because I am brave lol but so that I would get the excess fluid off and then not go in too heavy on Wednesday, so barring the fact I had fluid back and couldn't take quite all off with all the problems I only came off .3 kilos over which for a Monday is fine.:-)
So what else have I done today, well felt pretty cruddy when I got home about 1:00pm had some lunch and then chilled but decided doing something may help. So I went to do some cards-and probably wasted more paper etc than I used but do have 2 more cards to show for it-now at 31 for the fun day. I have also been promised another 5 by an online friend whose daughter is in the group I used to help run, so that will boost it a bit too.:-0
Tonight if I feel reasonably ok I will stitch on Midi I and watch tv. There is a week of programmes on about the organ donor register which I may watch-find it very raw really considering I can't have a transplant. However they are usually quite informative and well done so will probably watch it to see. One thing that puzzles me is why these programmes were not on during national transplant week last month as it would have been an ideal time.

Taken me all day to realise

Well its taken me until just a few minutes ago that 6 years ago today I was admitted to hospital with the failure of one kind of dialysis which led to sudden extreme illness. In the wee small hours this escalated and I ended up in ICU for a day.
This date always makes me edgy as I have a thing about anniverseries etc. Last week it was even worse as a couple of the features that landed me in ICU is what my friend had but for very different reasons. When this combined with Sara being in ICU not so long ago I started having some major flashbacks whenever I thought about it-esp this time when I was texting updates to friends as this was how I used to often update people on Sara and these people are the same this time.:-(
I know I have a long way to go with this stress but I am getting there slowly but surely. Keeping busy is doing wonders and thats why this day has mostly gone without me feeling its significance.
So today I have stitched on MVI and made 4 more cards and tonight I plan to stitch on Midi I for a bit and then chill out online later.

25 cards

No I haven't made that many today lol, but have got that many to contribute to the fundraising event 2 weeks today. I made 4 today and think I could probably get to around 50 by 2 weeks time if I go for some simple but effective designs.
Other than that I had a potter in to town, stitched a bit on Midi I and surfed online. I have been looking at the pictures of the GTG I had to miss and it looks like great fun and hope everyone enjoys themselves today. And for those off to Bakewell tomorrow hope you all enjoy that too and don't spend too much money.;-)

Good friends and family

For one reason or another the get together this weekend is not something I can get to. We have tried every which way around the situation and my parents offered to drive a 3 hour round trip to meet up with another bulletin border. But with view of my foot and my health which is excellent for a kidney patient at the moment its best to leave it. While I have good health I shouldn't jepodise it so I will do some more stuff for the fund raising day and stitch instead. Its a decision I am happy with and right for me and thats all you can do in this life.
Other than that there is good news about my friend in ICU. He has been out for a few days and stayed out, although there have been set backs and all is not A1 yet but its looking like its a slow but sure recovery. There is also good news on the personal front in that I am staying strong with the group and despite the fact I am needed I am not going back as certain things don't need to be revisited at this point in time.
I am also seriously considering the OU course again. I have until August 31st to decide so will maybe use my free weekend to really read up and decide.

Night all. :-)

Busy day

I have been to see a friend who had a transplant in November of last year and she is doing really well. We sat and drank tea, ate food and gossiped, so its been a really nice chilled out day. Tonight I am stitching on Midi I and chilling out some more. I am hoping for a relatively early night tonight but will try and stay up for an update on my friend who is ill, but they tend to come a bit earlier now so I should hopefully get to bed by 11:00pm at the latest. All being well tomorrow is likely to be busy so got to conserve my strength.

Busy but chilled

There were no water problems so on and off dialysis smoothly and relatively early.:-)
This afternoon I have sent some emails, chatted on the phone and generally chilled. I am off for a cup of tea and to make some more cards. Tonight I plan to stitch on Midi I which is slightly lacking so far. I am stitching part 1 and 2 together as it is easier for it to line up that way and looks like I have accomplished more overall.

Urrgghhh dentists

I suddenly ended up having an unsceduled visit to mine this morning. I hate them at the best of times but pain drove me there lol. I have had something that has felt like an ulcer since Friday and has been improving and getting worse at regular intervals. Last night I woke up at 5:00am and it was so painful that I couldn't turn over in bed and had a terrible throbbing on top and bottom teeth so off I went. It turns out it is a gum boil due to my wisdom tooth. :-( Apparently because my bottom left wisdom tooth was removed a few years ago the top one has nothing to rest on which makes it prone to infection. It doesn't mean it will have to come out but my dentist has warned me before that as they are also crowded they may all have to be removed. So its a weeks worth of antibiotics, then a deep clean in 3 weeks at my usual dental check up and see how its progressing.
The meal last night was really nice with a gooey ice cream pud yummmmyy. I suddenly felt shy for a bit but soon relaxed and got alot more sorted for the fundraising day. Its only 2 1/2 weeks away now eeekk but coming together nicely with just some bits and pieces to sort out and tick off the list.
Today I am working on this and stitching on MVI and hope you all have a great day as the sun is out and its looking good. :-)

Deja vu

Another dialysis another hours wait for the technician to come. Apparently a spare part is needed which ahs to come from Sweden so this could be a regular occurence for awhile. We didn't have time knocked off today either as it only happened on Friday and we had too much fluid to remove in a shorter time. Some people got away with half an hour less but I wasn't one of them and even then ended up with a bit of excess fluid on. Oh well on the flip side my BP is higher so thats something to be thankful for.
I am off for my meal in a few hours and really looking forward to the break away and a nice meal to boot.
I think I have finally decided on my fabric for Medieval Town Mandala and I think its going to be Parkland. I was just too worried about changing the count of fabric and some of the potential pitfalls of that. I did like Jobelan Lambswool but I think its a bit too dark as there is quite a bit of empty fabric and thinking about it Cookie Dough may have been the same. So Parkland Lugana it is and I will get that ordered very soon.
One other thing I forgot to Blog yesterday is my order at Stitching Bits n Bobs. I got 2 Lizzie Kate Flip its-a cat one and the dog version. I also ordered most of the Glorianas and Waterlilies needed for Japanese Garden and MXI. I usually buy the packages of these and ideally I want to get one each for my birthday and Christmas but they maybe a bit much if I haven't already got some of the threads. :-)

Busy day

Today started leisurely enough with some stitching on my rotation piece MVI, but it sort of spiralled from there. As I was stitching mum noticed that my magazines were spilling out of control so I promised to sort them out. I knew they needed doing but her nudge was what I needed to get to it.
Before that I had a flash of inspiration for my fabric for Medieval town Mandala so went off to do some floss tossing. The piece I wanted to try was one I had put aside for TW's Fortunate traveller but I couldn't find it. I did find a piece of Brittany in Bone, a piece of Belfast in Paltinum and a piece of Jobelan Lambswool and tried them all. I also tried Lugana Parkland again and I think I am leaning to Parkland but on my pictured they all look good DOH!!!!
So that took us to lunch time and after lunch I surfed on the net for a bit, went to sort out the dreaded magazines and then tidied my room and did some paperwork. After that I stitched on MVI before and after tea, chatted to Richard on the phone and then went to make some cards.
So that took me to 9:30pm at which point I had a shower, dried my hair and here I am. Its been a mundane day in many respects but I love those just as much as active ones as it is nice to just do ordinary stuff from time to time.
This week my calender is pretty full, with a meal tomorrow night, meeting a friend for the day on Thursday and then the weekend away on Friday. :-) Tuesday will be a stitching and chilling day and to start making some plans/lists for the weekend.

MVIII Part 8 completed

I have just finished Part 8 of MVIII this afternoon. I managed not to get any stitching done yesterday evening as I felt really down and actually ended up having a really good cry and missed the unveiling of the Big Brother winner. I was really disappointed about that but the cry and the long talk was needed so was worth itin the long run.
So here is my picture of Part 8:



This took quite alot longer that I anticipated and also I found the variegated thread a difficult one to match. This one kept changing colour so abruptly that I ended up hacking it to pieces to achieve the effect I wanted. In the end I used most colours that were in the thread just not always as they came off the skein. I started in error bottom right which was very light and bottom left turned alot darker so I stitched it so the opposite corners at the top would be similar in shading.
No other real news here except we had a wander into town this morning and I bought some magazines and a skirt. Tonight I plan to chill and stitch and generally try and relax.

Could have had a lie in

I hauled myself out of bed at 6:30am got to dialysis by 7:15am and was told there was a delay of at least an hour. Apparently one of the major components that makes all the machines safe and usuable failed completely and an technician was hot footing it down from Bristol. We all spent the time chatting and it was lovely because no one complained, everyone just accepted it and got on with it. I finally got on the machine at 8:50am and we all had an hour knocked off so I was actually finished on time.
A few things have also come to light this morning and they range from good to not so good. I am going to deal with the good first and they are that the surgeon I was referred to is on fairly equal footing with the one who refused to consider me. This means he maybe not have to seek full approval if he decides a transplant is viable. The choice of new machine for our unit has been narrowed from 3 to 2 and are going to be tested in Bristol for the consultants to see. The good news part is that one of them was the one I tried. :-)
Now onto the bad stuff which starts with those machines and that there is a rumour circulating that the funding is not there and we may not get them. The other thing is something I don't know whether to put it in this or the good catergory, but its to do with my BP. Something has gone awry with our scales which has been pointed out numerous times by one patient. He has a pair at home which always matched the units utterly and all of a sudden they stopped doing so and at the same time strange things started to happen. There were people complaining that the amount of fluid they had on wasn't correct, many who thought they were too dry and several who out of the blue developed BP problems. So on Wednesday after I left they were apparently calibrated which is a routine thing and were upto a Kilo out. This in all realism is only a couple of pounds in flesh weight, but if you think of it as a Litre bottle of water thats how much excess fluid was coming out of our system, so thats quite alot. This would also explain why people kept having drops of their BP as the scales were telling the nurses to remove that much extra each time.
My friend in ICU is making some good and significant progress which pleases me but for several reasons its all bought the group situation to light again and its come back to haunt me. It hadn't really ever gone but its bought it nearer the surface again and I realise again how much I allowed it to get to me.
But we all move onwards and upwards and tonight is the Big Brother grand finale. I am hoping to sit down and either finish MVIII Part 8 or make very big inroads into it so I can finish it tomorrow.
Finally hair watch:its looking ok today and I think I am gonna like it.:-)

The things you do when your bored

Today I was bored so opened up 'Salon Michelle'. Last weekend I bought a hair lightening kit so decided to have a go today. I am posting a few pictures but at the moment it is taking a bit of getting used to:





The front of my hair has always been alot lighter which is why its a bit of a shock now as it also bore the brunt of the creme lol. I am just glad the I didn't leave it on for the rest of the recommended time which was 5 minutes or for a bigger contrast another 15 minutes.I must admit mum helped me as well and in the end we took the 'slap it on and see' approach but I am beginning to think its not tooo bad.

Ok day so far

Today is going relatively ok. I woke up feeling rather naff and thought when I did yesterday it was dialysis related and I think thats still possible but its hanging over. Its the kind of effect that just goes as its time to go to the unit again but never mind as it doesn't happen every time lol.
My friend who is in ICU seems to be picking up a bit more now and they are ironing out and realising most of the problems and are able to do the best they can to sort them. It is having some unexpected effects on me and I am suprised at them. Firstly I am getting some flashbacks to two events, the first when Sara was in ICU and I was waiting for news as some of these events are similar this time around. Secondly until I chatted to my mum about the first flashbacks and she misunderstood what I mean't it clarified something else. Mum thought I was having flashbacks to my own time in ICU nearly 6 years ago. My friend went in with something almost identical but with different causes and I realised I was also getting flashbacks of that time too. The anniversary is in 10 days and although I am not like I used to be approaching it it still preys on my mind a bit. This year hasn't been so bad but I have had so much else on my mind I think lol.
Other than that I should finish MVIII part 8 in the next few days. I have an unexpected free day as my day out had to change because of work commitments on my friends part. We are now having dinner and a catch up on Monday. :-) I also saw Scully's partial Alpine HD and the screen shot of Alpine was so, so in my mind but I am now loving it more and more-SIGH.
Its a lovely sunny day today and will try and make the most of that this afternoon by chilling out in the garden with a book or my stitching.:-D

Big Brother

Big Brother are doing a shock mid-week eviction tonight in the lead up to Friday's grand final. I really wanted Derek to win but hes gone so would like Eugene to. However I don't always think it is fair that someone who hasn't been there the whole time can go on to win but its not like Kinga. She has been in less than 2 weeks which really would be an injustice for several reasons, not least she isn't that great relly. There have to be reasons why the ones coming in late didn't make the final 13 at the beginning and I understand some being in reserve but when Orlaith went only 11 days ago was it really necessary to replace her.
Other than that its been a quiet day with dialysis being tedious as yet again my BP is too low and I am finding it frustrating at the moment. It almost seems like there is just too much in my life to content with and though this is not a big deal its just an extra layer to the onion of problems lol.
Tonight I plan to stitch on MVIII and hopefully should finish part 8 over the weekend at the latest. Its then back to rotation, Midi I and a small piece which I haven't decided on yet.

Forgot to post earlier

I mean't to post a couple of pictures of my Chatelaine package as it was a real treat to receive it:

The first is how it comes in the box:



This second one shows what's inside the wrapper. It is not the full kit as I am choosing my own fabric and had some of the metallic threads here already:



It is like having an extra birthday/christmas when these arrive.:-)

Today

I have not stopped. This morning I was up and out of the house for my Urology appointment in Bristol. It pretty much went as expected in that the surgeon ran through the procedure as is going to get me booked in withing the next few weeks.
As I left this morning my Medieval Mandala kit arrived so I spent the afternoon unwrapping it and doing some floss tosses but have only narrowed it down slightly. Whilst I was doing that I decided to do some for Egypt garden as I found another possible in my stash but have decided to stick with the sand lol. Here is the link to where I ahve put my pictures and any comments are welcome-http://photobucket.com/albums/b44/Mep1975/. I have also posted on the Chatelaine board to ask for feedback. :-)
No other real news but maybe back later or definitely tomorrow.

Not much to report

I am still really tired and stressed out today and having dialysed everything is magnified esp as my BP is low again which makes me feel very fuzzy at the best of times.
One thing that is coming up is my trip up north in 12 days. There is a get together of UK stitchers and it will be the first time I have stayed away for one as I haven't travelled to one so far away before. I am really looking forward to it as I will be staying the night at Gina's with Liz the night before which should be a riot and then we will all travel up the following day and stay at Kate's that night. We may also possibley fit in a trip to the cross stitch shop in Bakewell and eat a tart or two lol. I haven't been away since early May and need a break badly so am looking forward to it and also keeping everything crossed it all comes off ok. :-)

Not such a good day

I am not feeling so great today. I couldn't get up this morning and I felt so tired and then have wrestled with feeling yucky all day. It kind of feels like a cold like bug at the moment but I am also feeling stressed which never helps.
The friend of mine who is in the hospital is quite up and down at the moment but barring any complications should be ok. Thats one bit of positive news although I probably won't completely relax until he is out of ICU for a few days as I have been here with other kidney friends before and its always difficult to predict what will happen.
No other news on the life front and on the stitching one I should finish my 3rd corner of MVIII tonight or tomorrow and then onto the 4th and last. I will then do two projects-my Midi Mystery I and something small as I am trying to achieve a HD every month if I can. If there is then time left in the month my rotation will get some attention.

An ok day so far

Its been a busy one today as I have been into town and had a good shop, made a few phone calls, sorted my tablets for the week and stitched on MVIII.
Last night we heard that the person who is ill has improved a bit so have to keep everything crossed this carries on as with kidney patients nothing is certain. It has however put us all back in touch with each other from the group which is a good thing as I wanted to repair some bridges and at least be on amicable terms with them all again. I did get the slight impression hints were being made today of me possibly helping again. I am not diving into anything and a hint won't work at the moment-being asked properly or a grovel may do. This time it would be on my terms and I would be doing it to keep the group together for Sara's sake and not because they are completely off the hook with regards to recent events. At the moment my own health is top priority and the rest can wait a bit.
I have asked on the Chatelaine board for some overlays in reference to Japanese Garden as I really want to do this on a coloured fabric rather than white. Although I like the black its not for me so am leaning towards a lighter colour in the greys, blue, greens area.
This week is going to be a busy one as I have the Urologist on Tuesday and seeing a friend on Thurs as well as dialysis Mon, Wed, Fri as usual. Will chill out next weekend lol.

What a day

Today is not good. I have heard that one of the members from the group I left is seriously ill in hospital. They are stable at the moment but it really brings stuff home as it was one of the people I argued with before I left and we never really got a chance to talk again. I feel bad about this now and it just goes to show that some things in life just aren't worth getting in a state about.

Pictures of Taffy

I have uploaded the pictures of Taffy from this morning and these are my two favourite. The first shows how playful he gets with any kind of foil and the second shows him guarding it much like a dragon guards its treasure:

A day of mixed emotions

Today is mums birthday and that is a good day obviously but its a day where my emotions are mixed as well. This time last year it was mums 60th and she very kindly gave up the evening to take me and Sara to a function at the hospital for young kidney patients. This was the first time Sara stayed the night and we spent the following day in town and on the beach as the weather was beautiful. As fate would also have it this was the last time we spent time with each other as for various reasons from flu to other events we didn't meet up again. I did see her once in hospital but that day she was quite out of it so this time last year is the last time I saw her as she was and I really thank my mum for leaving me with some great memories and giving up her evening to make this happen.
I have just taken a hiatus from writing this to go and play with Taffy in the garden. Mum has had some Ferro Rocher for her birthday and I hsve eaten one and Taffy has been playing with the wrappers lol. I will try and post some pictures of this later as some of them are really cute.
Earlier we rang the hospital to try and get a new shoe as my support shoe after 8 weeks is rather smelly and I don't want to knock people out with the smell lol. However it wasn't easy and they said people only wear the shoes with plasters and they would have to check etc etc. So in the end after a fight they said I could have a new one but it sort of puts you off really so we will try and get one tomorrow as I am near there for dialysis. Why is nothing ever easy eh?

Wow what a day

I have had a really interesting morning today. I never thought I would describe dialysis as interesting but our unit is trialling 4 new machines and will then purchase one of them. I was the 'lucky' person who got to try this weeks machine today. They thought I would be the perfect challenge for it as it has a more unique way of helping people get excess fluid off who also have problems in dropping their blood pressure. Usually the nurse works out how much you have to lose in fluid and the machine works out if its safe to do that amount in the time allotted. If not then you do extra at beginning and end to take any more off. But the dialysis machine takes off what you tell it to manually and if their are any problems with people being ill the nurse has to then tell the machine to change how much fluid is coming off.
This new machine does all that for the nurse. Essentially it takes BP every 5 minutes which isn't a problem as I thought that might be a nuisance and it then adjusts the amount of fluid coming off accordingly. If the fluid is coming off and the BP is stable then the rate of removal stays the same if the BP dips the rate of removal goes down. Add to that the power to tell the machine at what point you want the BP to go to before the nurse is alerted it should never reach a point that a patient faints because their BP is too low. This is indeed a really good thing and I have to say I had the easiest dialysis for a long while and feel pretty good this afternoon.
Obviously I can't compare it with the others but this is a revelation to me at how far they have come and its a real shame that our trust haven't had the funds sooner for new machines. Dialysis is pretty rough at times but something like this could make the process so much more bearable and I for one will be putting a good word in for it. :-)
Stitching wise I have started my third corner of MVIII and am off to order my Chatelaine MTM. Yayyyy.

Mindless quiz take two

Oh forget it as I went back to check what each letter of my name stands for and its changed so don't think I will bother lol.

MVIII halfway through and mindless quiz

I reached the half way point on MVIII part 8 tonight and am coming to terms with the border as I have been chopping my variegated silk into little pieces to try and get it to match and was still not sure if it was ok. I am sure it will be and its not variegated for no reason is it? ;-)
The mindless quiz is that I am putting in another post as it is coming up but appears at the bottom of the page. ;-S

Still anxious

But now for an entirely different reason which I cannot go into at the moment. I am so emotionally drained and exhausted and every tiny thing can make me so anxiety ridden as to feel almost ill. I know people reading this will be wondering if I am physically ok and I am so no need to worry bout that lol. ;-)
One other thing that happened yesterday is I had to put a friend off who invited me to a concert next Thursday as it dawned on me it was going to be at the balloon fiesta in Bristol and although my foot hardly hurts now the ground is not conducive to crutching it esp as it will be busy there too. We are going to meet and do something else instead so its not a huge thing just a small annoyance in the grand scheme of things that my foot is another thing that stops me doing normal stuff.
Anyway gonna go and get dressed and ready and stitch some more on MVIII and try and calm down a bit.

Fed up and anxious

Ok I need to have a moan. Today I am FED UP and this is for multiple reasons. Dialysis was not good as for the second session running I was sick. This time they hadn't set the machine up properly and air got in through the circuit. I had to come off and have it sorted and any kind of slight upset with the machine or needles makes me ill. I have been told its because this drops BP and mine has nowhere to go to start with. This is also a bone of contention as it was 'better' but the nurse was not happy so gave me some fluid to start with and then when the BP dropped I had to have more so am now 600 mls or .6 of a Kilo over what I should be. However I am not cross as I know they have a procedure to follow its just another source of why I am cheesed off.
The main reason is my foot and my immobility and the fact its summer and so much is going on but I have to think what is practical with this injury. I know its going to get better but my next appt is on Augst 30th so seeing as the break was on June 4th thats my whole summer like this. Still these things are sent to try us I suppose and at least I have an excuse to sit and stitch lol.
Not much other news except to say I am very, very nearly there for the money for Medieval Town Mandala so can order it THIS WEEK. Yayyyyyy.